


Feelings Are Fatal

by Bokutotheestallion



Series: Hinata Harem [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: AlotOfIt, Angst, Character Death, Death, Fluff, Gay, Haikyuu - Freeform, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Mental Institutions, Rarepair, Violence, WhoDoesHinataActuallyLike, butwestillstan, evilhinata, hinataiskindacrazy, itsquiteangstybecauseimateen, nosmut, onesidedlove
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:54:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 31
Words: 36,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25927729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bokutotheestallion/pseuds/Bokutotheestallion
Summary: Everyone is infatuated with Hinata.Everyone wants to love him, give him chocolates and treat him the best he could possibly be treatedWhat they fail to realise is Hinata is not as innocent as they think, how many hearts can he break, how many volleygays can he lead on, let's find outTwitter- thecultofbokutoWattpad- kodzukenstan
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Azumane Asahi/Hinata Shouyou, Bokuto Koutarou/Akaashi Keiji/Hinata Shouyou, Bokuto Koutarou/Hinata Shouyou, Bokuto Koutarou/Kozume Kenma, Hinata Shouyou/Everyone, Hinata Shouyou/Iwaizumi Hajime, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Hinata Shouyou/Kozume Kenma, Hinata Shouyou/Nishinoya Yuu, Hinata Shouyou/Oikawa Tooru, Hinata Shouyou/Sugawara Koushi, Hinata Shouyou/Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Hinata Shouyou/Tsukishima Kei, Iwaizumi Hajime/Nishinoya Yuu, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Series: Hinata Harem [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1902133
Comments: 89
Kudos: 318





	1. Home?

**Author's Note:**

> Hey BITCHESSSSS  
> This is my first real serious story, please critique it accordingly, I appreciate any comments, kudos or just hits  
> Love you  
> \- william

This is act I of II

Hinata's POV   
Let's just jump right in, hi, I'm Hinata Shoyo and I am being abused by my father, who apart from this year, has lived overseas working for factories, but the bastard gives no money to mother, meaning she has to work 2 jobs.

The reason that he is in Japan right now is because he got fired, and is taking it out on me, his son whom he has never met.

It doesn't help that he is a huge homophobic piece of shit, the only reason he knows I am gay is because he looked through my messages and saw one with Tanaka openly flirting with me, and of course, I flirted back.

That's just how Tanaka and I am, that how we work as friends.

Anyways back to father, usually when I come home from school he is hanging around with other men at the bar, sometimes he comes back with one and they fuck, yes, I see my father cheating on my mother, with other men, it's become a routine, avoid the couch.

The first time I saw him cheat on mother he pinned me on the wall, called me a "fucking faggot" and beat me up, making sure I would never tell anyone.

What he doesn't know- no, no one knows about me is that I could easily kill him, as I was born with a power.

What is it, you ask, well I'll give you a hint.

I can read minds.

Well there is your background information about me, so now that you know that let me re-introduce myself.

"Hi, I'm Hinata Shoyo. And I'm broken."

My main goal is to break people, I don’t even know why it’s just something that I want to do

Pretty fucked up right? Wanting to make people feel the pain that I felt.

Yeah, I’m a real life villain..... boo

Time skip to next day

I hear the alarm blaring, screeching even in my ear, wow I really should have chosen a better alarm sound

As I walk downstairs I see my mother making breakfast, Natsu is sitting in a kiddy booster, oh to be that young and ignorant again. And finally god forbid my father passed out on the couch.

As I pass both of them with a grin and a wave, I realise I'm already late for school, I hop on my bike and pedal as fast as I can, not wanting to miss out on any learning.

Oh sorry was that out of character for me? I'm actually quite smart, I just put up a dumb and likeable front so more people will fall for the innocent facade, so I lie, I lie about tests, I lie about my intelligence and I lie to my so called friends when I say I like them or enjoy their company.

They're all falling for it.

Right now I have the Karasuno volleyball club wrapped around my finger, none more than the clueless Kageyama Tobio, that milk loving idiot won't know what hit him, literally.

Time skip to after school, volleyball practice

"Nice serve KAGEYAMA!" I scream as I throw an arm around his shoulder, I see a light pink dust his cheeks.

Perfect, just the reaction I wanted.

"Hi-hinata b-boke, get your arm off of me before I slap you" 

I give him a cheesy grin and he blushed, he full on blushed, oh this is entertaining.

"Kageyama, baby, you feeling ok, you're looking a little red?" I say with a smirk that rivals Tsukkis. He'd be proud at my teasing, too bad he's my next target.

"B-boke, um, actually can we talk about something after practice, I need to tell you something"

I silently laugh, not letting anyone see as I just nod and go back to practice.

I know exactly what this bitch is about to say, too bad I have some news of my own to share.

Chapter end 

What did you think? This idea is really fun to write


	2. Moving away?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The start of the true hinata featuring heartbroken Kageyama
> 
> WARNING  
> VIOLENCE  
> HOMOPHOBIA  
> BROKEN KAGEYAMA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on  
> Instagram- william.marinn  
> Wattpad- kodzukenstan

Kageyama's POV  
I'm so exited, every time Hinatas short figure touches mine I get flustered, when he threw his arms around me I felt complete, I've liked him for nearly a month now and I have never thought I had a chance until now.

Did he really wink at me? Did he really call me baby? How is he so smooth? I was to marry him, he's so cute and innocent, like a puppy.

I keep on daydreaming about how our married life will go I feel contact at the side of my head, oh fuck, forgot we were still doing volleyball, by brain is too focused on the subject of my future husband Hinata.

One of my favourite things about Hinata is how we relate on so many things, we're both very focused on volleyball and not to mention, we are both kind of dumb, but our common traits are so much more than that.

I don't just have a crush on him, I love him.

I love his orange hair, like who else even has that vibrant hair naturally, no one but my sunshine, if I lost him I don't think I could live.

He's the only person that won't abandon me, he hits my tosses, he's stayed with me and has had to deal with my fake shitty attitude, that was just me trying to hide my feelings, if we date I'll spoil him so hard with everything he wants, I'll be the best boyfriend/husband for hinata, without him I would be nothing. 10th of April 2016. Today is the day. 

I'm praying that he will accept my confession 

After practice

Hinata's POV  
So the king has abandonment issues, nice to know, I'll add that to the list of weaknesses I have on people.

"Kageyama! Weren't we going to walk home together"

He looks up and blushes, he's so hopeless  
"hi-hinata, um, yes w-we were, unless you don't want to which is totally fine, oh, but, I have to tell you something" he rushes out, oh Kageyama, so clueless.

"No it's totally fine, I'll walk with you, oh and I have something to tel, you too, babe" he says coolly, Kageyama's face turns a deep shade of crimson as we start walking.

'Omg he just called me babe, he likes me, I hope he does, we can get married and adop-'  
Oh wow, Kageyama's thoughts are really fluffy, let's break him down

"Hey Kagey-"  
"hi-hinata"  
"You go first" we both shout at the same time, wow this is going perfect

"let's just go at the same time kags" I say with a hint of flirt in my tone 

'Oh shit how am I keeping count, I hope he confesses, please confess hinata' I hear his thoughts and grin  
'3  
2  
1'  
"Im in love with you hinata"  
"I'm moving to Tokyo and moving in with my aunt"  
"W-what, please don't leave me hinata, you're all I have, I'm nothing without you, do you like me, please say you like me"

I can finally stop playing this innocent character, this is my moment  
"well Kageyama, babe, you were right about one thing" I start, his eyes glimmer in hopefulness as I call him the pet name.  
"You are nothing without me" then I walk up to him, his once hopeful eyes are filled with tears.

"What does that mean hi-hinata, don't you love me?"  
"WhAt DoEs ThAt MeAn HiNaTa" I mock "it means exactly what you think you dirty faggot, as if I would ever like someone like you, who only thinks of them self you selfish prick, burn in hell"

I kick him in the face as I hear him sob, "why hinata, I still love you, we can still work out, please, don't leave me" I stand on his jaw as I hear him sob into my foot.

"Don't make me laugh Tobio~chan, now I have a one way ticket away from your needy ass, so toodeloo fag.

I leave him there

On the ground

And I walk away

Feeling the best I've ever felt.

I just have one more person I need to go to before I catch my plane.

Chapter end

Who is hinata going to see?


	3. Goodbye gift~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama writes um, something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning
> 
> Suicide
> 
> Cutting 
> 
> Major character death

Kageyama's POV  
What just happened, what happened to my innocent Hinata, what do I have to live for if my one true love thinks I'm worthless.

After I get up from the ground that my crush attacked me on, I start crying even harder, I run home as fast I can, ignoring the welcoming words my family gave me.

They have never cared.

But Hinata did? Didn't he?

I know what I have to do, I get a pen and pencil and start writing, pages on pages of words for people that loved me.

And 2 pages just for my Hinata.

After that I run to the bathroom to find the razors, if I can't be happy with Hinata, then I should just die, after his confrontation all of my will to live has left.

I slice my arms

1

2

3

4

5

6

I stop there, 12 cuts already and I haven't passed out, Hinata would want me to keep going, this is for you Hinata.

I move to my legs

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

Before I pass out from blood loss I mutter one final phrase

"I love you b-boke"

Hinata's POV

Well, isn't that just lovely news, Kageyama Tobio, genius setter has committed suicide.

Wonder why?

Supposedly he left all of us a note, as If I can be bothered reading that, probably lacks proper punctuation to be understood anyway.

I chuckle to myself

Going to school was solemn, students were shocked at the fact of such a confident boy committing suicide, teachers were shocked that a student who they knew as happy if not a little grumpy left them this early.

But the volleyball club, now that was a mess.

As expected I play a muck, acting as distraught if not more, distraught than the others, they knew Kageyama as my best friend, only if they knew.

"Hinata, I know this is a tough time for us all, so if you need to speak out please do, I knew how close you ar-were with him" Suga says softly, messing up by using present tense, oh sweet innocent Suga, think of yourself for once.

This Karasuno act is going to be closed very soon, but until then I still need to be the Hinata they know. "Suga-senpai I-I just really miss him, and I loved him so, so much, I wish he knew how much he meant to me" I say through fake sobs.

Someone get me an Oscar because my acting today is on point!

Suga just wraps me in his arms, saying comforting words.

I give him a bright smile, which he takes as me trying to cheer everyone else, time to shock I guess.

"Um guys can I have your attention" they all turn to me, with puffy cheeks and red eyes.

"Of course Hinata, you can say anything to us" Daichi says, I give him a 'sad' smile and continue.

"Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but" I take a gap in between sentenced to draw out suspense and give myself some time to act sad, "I'm moving to Tokyo next week" I finish and everyone gasped.

Noya-senpai is the first one to speak up as tears stream down his face "why Hinata, we just lost Kageyama, we can't lose our sunshine right after" he says sadly, sorry Noya, your sunshine never existed, I'm just a light bulb, dark and mysterious but I can put on a bright front.

The whole team agreed with Noya, with a silent nod and a slight turn of the head, oh fuck, they expect me to say something.

"I-IM SO SORRY! YOU GUYS WILL ALWAYS BE MY TEAM" I start sobbing uncontrollably as the whole team joins, even Tsukki, while my face is in the crook of Suga's neck, I try to focus into Tsukkis thoughts.

Shouldn't be too hard to do saying that most of this team are simpletons focused on the death of Kageyama.

'Hinata, you can't leave, we love you" - ah Suga and Daichi, ever the parents, unless they meant something more, what's with the 'we'

"HINATA PLEASE DONT LEAVE ME I LOVE YOU" - Tanaka, oh wow, this love thing is becoming overwhelming

"Hmph" jackpot "the fucker thinks he can leave me after my crush died, as if" - oh, Tsukki, Tsukki, Tsukki. I'll do just that

Operation expose Tsukishima (anonymously of course) is a GO

Chapter end  
3 chapters today, and I'm not stopping, evil hinata is living in my mind rent free atm


	4. Operation Tsukishima

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukki and hinata have a heart to heart.  
> Tsukki might or might not have caught feelings too quickly  
> But maybe hinata has too?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning  
> Depression  
> Generally just very sad Tsukki

Tsukishima' s POV  
Kageyama, the king, the person who I so dearly tried to hide my infatuation with, killed him self, and we will never know why.

I don't even know why I liked Kageyama, we always fought, always at each others throats, but I always admired him, and his talent.

Maybe if I confessed, not even, maybe if I had been nicer to Kageyama, he could have been my king, even if I started recently I doubt that would have changed, whenever Kageyama wanted something, he usually got it. 

So he must have really thought that it was his time, wish I could have stopped him.

But what broke my heart, was his letter to all of us.

He wrote that it was to everyone he loved, or thought loved him, so naturally I didn't even get a mention, fuck, even Yamaguchi did, when the team realised that I was left out they didn't do anything, scared I was going to lash out.

I just want love. I just want someone to hold me, kiss me.

I want Kageyama back.

The icing on top of the cake was that the glue that held this team, Hinata Shoyo, was leaving, why does everyone leave me.

It was probably my fault, I always bullied him and Kageyama, I didn't mean it, I hope he knows this.

I see Hinatas orange mop heading my way, this is my opportunity to say sorry, maybe that will keep him with me for a bit longer.

"Are you alright Tsukki, you look sad" Hinata asks, what the fuck does that mean.

"Hey, Kei I have a question for you, what did you think of Kageyama? And extension question just because you're so smart, did you actually hate him, or were you hiding something, y'know, more?" He asks

What

The

Fuck

Does he know something, please don't know Hinata, for my sake.

"Um, what do you mean Hinata, I'm not sure I understand" I say as confident as I possibly can.

He just looks at me blankly, like an idiot, I never realised how scary his stare was, I'm scared, I'm scared of someone so much smaller than me, what do i do.

"Well Tsukki" he says while edging closer towards me, having me cornered, "I meant what I said" he said in the most delightful voice I've ever heard.

"Um, Hinata, you're- um ok to answer your questions, I hated Kageyama, he was an asshole and deserved to die, what was I hiding, my full hatred I guess" and I hear a beep.

Fuck

Hinata recorded me saying that he deserved to die

What do I do.

"Hi-hinata, why did you record that" I'm scared shitless,  
"Well Tsukki, I'm on a mission, and you are my assignment" he says, cheerily as he does the unexpected, he locks his lips onto mine, giving me a loving kiss.

Hinata's POV

This is all going to plan, as I put my lips on his he melts, like a lovesick puppy that just wanted well, love.

As I go in for another kiss I whisper into his ear "I know that you were in love with Kageyama, Tsukishima, you don't have to lie to me" and his the force of his 190cm body comes into contact as he starts sobbing into my shoulder.

Perfect

"Tsukki I know this is early but, I love you and I have for a long time, so let me comfort you" I say to him, all the fear from his eyes has been replaced with sadness, but far back I see happiness, little shards in the back of his eyes.

I can't wait to smash them one by one.

"Hinata, can I go back to your house to cuddle, I've never done it before and I don't think I want to see my family at the moment" the distraught French fry says to me, tears still threatening to come out.

Wow he's in deep already, must have been waiting for this opportunity, for a while, being his first and last love doesn't sound so bad.

By that I mean, he will not believe in love after me.

Time skip to 7pm in Hinata's bed  
Still Hinata's POV  
I expected getting Tsukki to fall for me to be a long process, targeting him when he was weak was GENIUS.

While we cuddle I whisper comforting things into his ear and he just holds me tight, this is a whole side to Tsukishima Kei that I never expected to see.

How sweet, if only my heart didn't belong to someone else

Time skip to next day  
Hinata's POV  
I wake up to a baron bed, as I remember what happened yesterday I grin.

Suddenly I hear my phone buzz, it's Tsukishima, how cute

Tsukki 🤢  
Hinata, are we boyfriends?

Hinata  
Of course we are, are we going public at school.

Tsukki 🤢  
Anything for you baby, can we cuddle at school, I'm lonely.

Hinata  
Of course, cya there ❤️

I smile, I actually smile, why would I smile at Tsukishima of all people, maybe it's because he's so vulnerable, it has to be that.

Or is it.

Deep down, at the moment I don't want to hurt Tsukki, this is fucking confusing.

New plan, keep Tsukki with me he's too cute to betray.

Fuck that's going to hurt both of us after I move, I'll keep in contact Tsukki I promise, I don't need you to become as broken as I am

Ugh sometimes I hate having a heart

Chapter end  
Does hinata have a soft spot for Tsukki?  
Yes is the answer.  
Don't worry more boys will be betrayed but for me  
Tsukki was just acting too cute to betray,  
Anyways adios


	5. Reliance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata leaves to go to the plane, messages some people, Tsukki gets slapped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings  
> Violence  
> And some nice betrayal

Hinata's POV  
I've come to the conclusion that I have some of those shitty things that people refer to as 'feelings' for Tsukki.

I've also realised that said 'feelings' won't stop me from doing what I want to do, instead of hurting Tsukki physically, I just need to break him emotionally a bit more.

This is where my recording comes into play. I was so focused in liking Tsukki that I forgot about it, actually, I didn't even remember it until I went back on my phone to see Tsukkis messages.

As I arrive at school I see Tsukishima waiting out the front, for me?

"Hinata, I missed you" he runs up to me. How the fuck is this the same saltyshima from 3 days ago.

"Tsukki it's been literally 3 hours since you left my house to sneak back" I say with an amused expression, this boy makes me feel emotions, gross.

"But I wanted more cuddles" he says, WHO IS THIS AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO TSUKISHIMA KEI.

"Tsukki, you do realise I'm still moving in three days, right" when I say this his face drops, he must have forgotten, I feel bad, all he wanted was a rock to lean on but with me he got cardboard.

Sorry in advance Tsukishima.

Time skip to hinatas moving day  
Tsukishima POV 

Hinata and I have spent the past 3 days connected by the hip, he gives me the best cuddles and makes me forget about everything bad happening in the world.

I want to be with him forever, did I mention how good his cuddles, for a small boy he makes me feel so secure, he's my rock.

Then I realise what day today is.

He's moving away

Why can't I just get a fucking break, this world hates me so much, the idea of dealing with a whole day without even seeing Shoyo is confronting for me, he's the only thing keeping me stable.

"Hina, when is your train ride?" I ask, wanting to make the most of my last minutes with him before he leaves.

"2 hours" he mumbles sleepily, "OH FUCK, 2 HOURS, GOTTA GO, BYE TSUKISHIMA, LOVE YOU, CALL ME" he winks and after 20 seconds, he leaves.

Just like that he is gone.

Hinata's POV

I lied, all I do is lie, but this time it was to get away from Tsukki, I couldn't stand seeing him in pain any longer.

As I look at the time on my phone, I notice there's 12 hours until my train arrives, that gives me time to continue to plan.

I guess I've been a bit distracted.

Group chat started  
Members  
Sugamama  
Dadchi  
Noya  
And  
AnonymousUSER122

Anonymous  
Hey

Dadchi  
Who are you

Sugamama  
Do we know you? What do you want?

Noya  
Hi stranger, I love group chats, let's be friends.  
Anonymous  
Uh, sorry, no thanks.  
Anyways I just created this to show you guys something I overheard on my walk home.  
You go to Karasuno and worked closely with Kageyama Tobio, right?

Suga  
Please don't mention that name, but yes we do  
Do you go to Karasuno too? 

Anonymous  
You could say that.  
Anyways this is what I wanted to show you.  
Anonymous sent a voice memo that plays for 33 seconds.

AnonymousUSER122 ended the chat  
AnonymousUSER122 blocked all members of the chat

Hinata's POV

I don't feel good at all, Tsukki will break without the team on his side, and will know that it was me who sent that voice memo.

Is this what heartbreak feels like, I have now caused someone's death on purpose, and might have broken my boyfriend in a way that he will never forgive me.

Being bat shit crazy has its quirks, but falling in love, relying on someone after only loving them for 3 days, And to leave them right after, it's just outright cruel. But my standard of myself are non existent so I should recover, and onto the next target I guess, Kuroo Tetsuro of nekoma high.

I'm coming for you next, baby.

3rd person POV

After the three in the group chat got the first message, they quickly got together, thinking it was suspicious, and they were right.

Noya, he was already sad but someone declining his friend request hurt him for some reason, hypersensitivity is a bitch.

As the conversation progresses the three realise that this AnonymousUSER122 is not a stable person, and as it was a school day, they waited until the whole of Karasuno volleyball club could come over, they were all as suspicious as Suga, Noya and Daichi.

This get together was the fate sealer for Tsukishima Kei.

As the three received the voice memo, they froze, ever confident, Nishinoya was the boy that played it. What they heard, chilled them to the core.

"Hey Tsukishima, what did you think of Kageyama?" A cheerful voice that the whole club recognised as Hinata Shoyo, some of them grinned, hearing hinata sound so happy.

Then there was Tsukishima Kei, in the corner of the room, shitting his pants, he knew what was coming, he was scared, scared he was about to lose his only friends.

"I hated Kageyama, he was an asshole and deserved to die" the whole team fast collectively, turn around and stare at Tsukishima.

Tsukishima'sPOV 

Tsukishima wanted to die, he wanted his boyfriend, he wanted to get out, but his legs were not allowing him to move.

Tsukishima was stuck, frozen, paralysed in fear.

A hard slapping sound echoes around the table, Tsukishima looks up to see Daichi, who hit him with all of his might.

"TSUKISHIMA KEI, HOW. THE. FUCK. COULD. YOU. SAY. THAT"  
Tsukishima trembles under the teams judgemental gaze.  
"ANSWER ME YOU SALTY SHIT, AND BE FUCKING TRUTHFUL"

Out of the corner of his eye Tsukishima saw Yamaguchi Tadashi, crying.

What has he done.

"Sho- Hina- Hinata asked me about my feelings towards Kageyama. And Hinata scared me and my mouth talked before my brain could-"

SLAP SLAP SLAP 

Three hands came into contact of the face of Tsukishima, it was Sugawara, Nishinoya and Tanaka who were looking furious, none more than Sugawara Koushi.

"Tsukishima, you are trying to tell me, that the person who you have treated so terribly this whole year, the embodiment of sunshine, the ever smiling Hinata Shoyo scared your egotistical ass" Sugawara spoke calmly, too calm to be actually calm, he was fucking furious.

"You- you've got it all wrong, Hinata and I became boyfriends, he loved me, I will call him now, please give me a chance to explain"

They all nod, not giving Tsukishima any more time.

"GET ON WITH IT!" Ennoshita roared, that scared me.

I call Hinata and they see his contact name as 'babe 💕💝' and all look at me, puzzled.

God I hope he picks up

Chapter end  
What will Shoyo do?


	6. Back rubs and backstory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It seems that tsukishima Kei is the only person that hinata actually trusts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this, and evil person getting character development, I think so

Hinata's pov  
Oh fuck, Tsukishima is calling me.

This is one of two things. He will either be calling because he misses or or he figured out that I betrayed him.

I really hope that it's the first one.

I pick up immediately, I'm not playing any more games with Tsukishima.

On the line I hear Daichi's voice first.

"Hinata, Tsukishima has something to ask you" then he here's Daichi mutter a 'right Tsukishima' 

"Oh of course, Tsukki baby you can ask me anything" I say reassuringly, not letting my worry show.

"Hinata, they slapped me, they w-want to kill me, Hinata I'm scared, help me" then I hear a loud slap and hear a loud voice scream "ASK YOUR FUCKING QUESTION TSUKISHIMA" and to that I hear him start sobbing.s

"Guys, I'm going over there right now to sort this out, I'm going to change my train to tomorrow for this so be grateful, and if one of you even thinks of touching my Tsukki again then you are going to FUCKING DIE~"

I hear everyone on the line go cold, I doubt they expected their innocent Hinata to react like that.

I'm coming Tsukishima.

Time skip to when hinata arrives at school  
Tsukishima' s POV

The whole volleyball club was waiting near the gate, still shocked at the phone call, I was just happy to hear Hinata standing up for me.

As I see the familiar orange mop I feel tears well in my eyes, I run up to me and wrap him completely in my arms. The whole volleyball club gasps, I can't believe they haven't noticed how affectionate we have been, they must be really dumb.

I snicker at the thought before I remember what Hinata was actually here for.

"So, Karasuno~, so lovely to see you again, now if you could explain to me why you hit my Tsukki that would be lovely~" the shock on their faces was evident. But more present on many of their expressions. They were jealous.

They all liked Hinata, they call wanted to be 'hinatas' and seeing him be affectionate to me riled them up.

"Hina, some random person sent them the voice of our conversation about Kageyama" he let out a gasp and wraps me tight in his small arms.

"Tsukki, are you ok, what do these people want with us, that was just you being emotional, I know you didn't mean any of it, you miss him as much as we do~" and then he turns to the so called 'team'.

"So, Sawamura, Chikara and anyone else that slapped him, you're telling me that you think the 'appropriate reaction' to someone's emotion driven speech about someone who took their own life, is to make said person hate himself even more, do you want the same thing to happen to Tsukishima" and then I hear him mutter something but I didn't hear.

"Hinata, Tsukishima, I-" Daichi sounded so shocked at Hinata's monologue.

"SAVE IT, SAWAMURA" Hinata screams, he screams at a third year for me, he's truly my saviour.

He looks up at me and says "Come with me, to Tokyo, my mother bought me an apartment, we can share it, I don't want you to be alone with these monsters" and I feel my face brighten.

The whole teams face dropped, knowing that they personally drove out a member after what could easily be resolved as how Tsukishima was mourning.

Hinata to motions me to get up and follow him and I'm ecstatic, I know my mother will agree because she has wanted me out of the house since I was 14.

As Hinata calls an Uber to pick us up and drive us to my house, he jumps into my lap and locks his lips with mine.

No lust was involved in this kiss, it was him trying to comfort me without words, I appreciated it so much, I appreciate him so much.

"Hinata, why have you hidden your true self from me, I know you're not happy all the time"

Hinatas pov

Shit, what do I say, how does he know?

"What do you mean Tsukishima?" I try to say calmly but my mask is slipping, i might have to tell him the truth.

"Hinata, I just want you to know that I love you, and that you can tell me anything" he says while rubbing my back, I could tell he is preparing for a backstory.

Well, I can't seem to lie to him.

"It started when i was 6. My father worked overseas and has for my whole life up until this year, so my mother was often cheating on him with other men, usually much younger than herself, one of them she ended up falling in love with, his name was Kageyama Yuko, 33 years old"

Tsukki gasped at the familiar name but didn't say anything and ushered me to continue.

"It started out amazing, he always treated mother right, and before we know it mother got pregnant with my little sister, Natsu.

"His only problem with the family was me, Natsu was now his biological daughter so his need to treat me well dissipated, before I knew it he was abusing me. Every day when I came back from school he would hit me to the point of bleeding, bruises littered my entire body"

"Then on the eve of my tenth birthday, he said tomorrow he would give me a 'big gift', and my childish ass thought that he finally was going to treat me like a son"

"The day after that, on my birthday I went up to him, he asked if I wanted the gift and I nodded excitedly"

"He raped me that entire day, it started with him fucking my throat so ruthlessly that I couldn't make a sound, then when he was done there he fucked me for 3 hours straight."

"When he was done he abused me"

At this point I'm crying, I'm not one to reminisce on the bad moments for obvious reasons. I feel Tsukki wrap his large arms around me, hugging me as tight as he could.

"From this point until I started dating you, I've been hiding my true self, I'm not a happy person but you make me want to be, I'm evil, I killed Kageyama, Tsukki, do you remember when I told you that I was on a mission and you were my target"

"Yes I do, what did that mean?" He asks with a cute-confused face.

"It means I wanted to break you Tsukishima, just like I broke Kageyama, my plan backfired and now I'm in love with you. Do you really want to move to Tokyo with someone who wanted to hurt you?"

Tears were welling In Tsukkis eyes at this point "I know how you really feel now, and I want to be by your side, even if it's for you getting revenge on others, I'll stick by you, I'm your middle blocker" he says, how is it legal to be as adorable as he is, it shouldn't.

"Tsukki, I didn't have good intentions with you but now, I think I'm truly in love with you" I say with a soft smile.

"Hinata, if we stay together can you promise me one thing, be your true self, if not around others then please be yourself around me. I love you every way" he says happily.

"Of course, Kei" I say while still latching On to him, that seems like all we do, and I love it.

Time skip to them being on the train  
Hinatas POV

There's one final thing I'm hiding from Kei, my plans, I'm scared he will think I'm cheating on him if I don't tell him, but will he think I'm completely evil if I tell him.

Fuck, he's put up with all of my past, he deserves to know the future.

"Kei" I start "I have one more thing I need to confess to you about myself" he nuzzles into my shoulder as a sign to start.

"I'm not just going to Tokyo to get away from my father, I also have been planning some things" I take a break so he can hear it all "I want you to know that these plans involve other people being in love with me, and I a, going to break them, like I did with Kageyama" I finish.

"Hinata, who are you doing this to, do they deserve this?" He asks. I really don't know how to answer that so I just tell the truth. "Kuroo, Kenma and Lev from Nekoma and Bokuto and Akaashi from Fukurodani" I know that Tsukki could tell if I was lying.

No use lying to someone I actually love.

"A-are they all going to kill themselves, please tell me you weren't trying to kill me" he says, now scared for them but mainly himself.

"I'm just trying to break them all, mentally, make them think they have a chance, lead them all on and then ditch them to the dirt, what they do after that is up to them, and Tsukki, I was never trying to kill you, but I didn't have good intentions at the start" I say, this boy makes me tell the truth, even if I don't want to, he is my weakness.

He just smiles at me as I hear the train say  
'Now arriving at- nekoma high stop" and grab on to Tsukki's shirt, as we walk out to the apartment.

We are officially Nekoma Students.

Chapter end  
Please vote and comment


	7. Hyena, who’s a hyena?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some more rushed writing involving an almost dead Kuroo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNINGS  
> VERBAL ABUSE  
> VIOLENCE

Hinatas POV  
I've now been living with my boyfriend, Tsukishima Kei for 2 days and we are about to enter nekoma high.

"Hey Kei, are we going to play Volleyball here?" I ask, I don't really care about playing volleyball, maybe I can use this to my advantage.

"Not with Kuroo, he gets on my nerves, do you want to play?" he asks me, ugh he's so thoughtful.

"I think I'll use my skills In volleyball to my advantage, you do know that Kuroo is my target, right?" I say, and his face lights up, huh, what?

"Omg can I help, I'll be in the background but I'd take great happiness in seeing Kuroo fall from grace" oh wow, Kei, tell us how you really feel, my face lights up at this though, my boyfriends wants to help me? In breaking someone? Who. Would. Have. Guessed.

"You can do whatever you want Tsukishima, I'm not your boss I'm your boyfriend" I give him a soft smile, I really like this boy ugh I hate liking people. It's a waste of time. But for some reason I have all the time in the world for my baby.

He looks so exited, like a kid in a candy shop, wow he really must hate this butch, seeing Tsukishima happy makes me happy.

Ignore the fact that I have emotions for 2 hot minutes.

I feel a familiar cat like gaze at my back, Kenma.

"Shoyo, what are you doing here?" I hear him speak in a monotonous voice, I just ignore him, walking hand in hand with Tsukishima to the principal's office.

"Tsukki, what club should we join" he looks like he's thinking really hard, with a little pout on his face, oh he's just SO CUTE.

"Hina, I've always wanted to learn art, can we join the visual arts club" he says after a minute of walking in silence. He looks really exited about this revelation, how could I say no.

"Of course baby, whatever you want"

As we get our schedules I realise that we have every class but 1 with eachother, thank god.

When we get out of the principals office, I see that Kenma was waiting for us outside. "Did you not hear me Shoyo, why are you here?" Kenma asks politely. As I'm about to speak Tsukki cuts in.

"Pudding, get out of my boyfriends face and go talk to your only friend the fucking hyena, and of course he's the only person who would be your friend because you are both shit people, you're a fucking useless loner, leave me and sho alone" oh wow, I did not expect that, I'm so proud, tsukishima gets more redeeming qualities every day I swear.

I see Kenmas eyes show sadness as he mutters a 'I thought we were friends, Shoyo' and he storms off, time to read the mind of a cat.

"Oh wow, I'm so sad, I thought we were friends, I can't believe Shoyo agreed with saltyshima, what happen-" oh wow is this boys thoughts boring, his personality is a snooze fest, thank god I know how to deal with that.

"Tsukki that was SO COOL, as expected from my amazing boyfriend" I say, he blushes, "ooh does someone have a ~praise kink~ you should have told me Tsukki" I say smoothly as I see his face flash the darkest shade of red, HOW CUTE.

Kuroo' s POV

I walk into the school and I could feel that something felt odd.

My suspicions were confirmed when I say Kenma running down the hallway, hands covering him.

I need to find him.

I run down the hallway that he was just running down and see kenma, sobbing under the stairs.

"Kenma, what's wrong?, you never cry" I see him look up at me, eyes puffy and his sobs take control of him.

"Sho- Shoyo, k-Karasunos tall middle blocker, are here" I look at him confused, I thought he had a crush on Shoyo, wait TSUKKI IS HERE, "why are they here?, and isn't that a good thing, I thought you liked Shoyo".

I see him flinch as tears run down his face again, he starts hyperventilating into my chest "ku-Kuroo, he called me friendless, a loner, useless and sho agreed, they just ignored me when I first tried to talk to them then they attacked me".

Tsukki and Shorty did what now, Kenma continues sobbing into my chest and I hold him close, he's like my little brother, I need to protect him.

Seems like two Karasuno volleyball players might need to be put in their place.

"Kenma, where were they when they did that" he looks up at me "outside the office, please don't hurt them Kuroo, I doubt sho meant it, I'll talk to him, just don't hurt Shoyo" Kenma pleads 

"Can I come with you when you talk to them, just so if they go off I'll defend you, nothing physical I promise" and he just nods.

Time to find the ant and the giraffe.

Hinata's POV

First two periods of school went smoothly, Nekomas schooling system is a lot like Karasuno's, we will be fine here for the time we stay here.

The little bitch, Kenma wasn't expecting that wasn't he. I laugh to myself as I remember seeing him cry. What a fucking loser.

It's our first break and Tsukki and I found a nice spot underneath some stairs as we cuddle we hear loud steps as we see two figures heading towards us.

Kuroo and Kenma

"Hi Kenma, Hi Kuroo, what did you WANT from us" I say, making sure they could hear my passive aggressiveness"

I see Kenma flinch back into Kuroo's chest as Kuroo speaks "I want you to apologise to kenma for being rude" I just laugh and I see something strike his eyes.

Rage

Bingo

"Can't the little bitch do it himself, why does he care so much anyways, I never liked him, I just faked being his friend because I thought he was cute~" I see Kenma start sobbing, fuck he's so loud, SHUT UP.

It seemed that this took Kuroo by surprise as well, as he flinched at my harsh words.

"and you" Tsukkishima says to Kuroo "you're an idiot, during the training camp I was leading you on, you're a fucking annoying hyena who never shuts up, it's always competition this, Yaku that, you're a sheep Kuroo, as much as you would like to think you are a 'great leader', you're not, you're shit and even you know it"'

The most unexpected thing happens next 

Kuroo walks up to Tsukki, and kisses Him.

On. The. Lips.

Oh he's going to get it now. I'm just going to sit back and watch the show.

"Tsukki, don't you feel anything, you said you felt something last time, please tell me you still do" I hear Kuroo plead

He's exactly like Kageyama, pleading.

Pathetic.

I hear a slap echo around the room and right after that I hear Kuroo's body hit the ground.

"Why would I ever like someone as pathetic as you, you're nobody with your hideous face and disgusting face. Oh and you suck at sex too. Face it, the world would be better without you" and I see Kuroo's face completely drop.

Seems this stay at nekoma was shorter than expected.

As I go up to Kenma, I kiss him forcefully, I feel him kissing back.

Loser still thinks he has a chance,

Maybe I Should keep him around, he is rich after all.

It all depends on what Kuroo does. I the kiss and he lets out a small moan. I go back to Tsukki and Kuroo to see how that is going.

Tsukki keeps beating him up, he's going too far, Oh fuck.

KUROO IS NOT MOVING 

"TSUKKI STOP HE ISNT MOVING" and I see Tsukkis eyes flash and he looks down

And the fucker grins at me and envelops me in a hug. Huh?

I regain the little sanity I have and dial the police and ambulance.

'what's the emergency?" A bored sounding woman asks

"A boy was nearly beaten to death at school, please get police cars and an ambulance as quick as you can" I say.

Then I realised I just threw Tsukki under the bus, oh fuck.

"Tsukki I'm so s-"

"It's fine, Hinata, I deserve it, anyways it was worth it, to see his face, that's worth jail" he says

This bitch is insane, I love it.

"If he doesn't die and you don't get life in prison I'll be there for you when you get out, I promise" I say while hugging him.

We're so fucked up, it's like we were made for eachother

When the police and ambulance arrive they check Kuroo to see if he's alright, he's still breathing but lightly.

I let out a sigh of relief for Kei.

Kenma and I get interviews by hundreds of people, because we were the main witnesses.

As you would have guessed in a situation with Kenma, I did most of the talking.

3 days later we find out Kuroo might have suffered brain damage and has been induced in a medical comatose.

Tsukishima Kei got a 4 year sentence with no parol for the attempted murder of Kuroo Tetsuro, mental health cut it down from 12 to 4.

My schedule for school got fucked up because of the trial, and I ended up not going for 'trauma reasons' and I have now been moved to fukurodani.

This could not have worked out BETTER 

Chapter end   
Poor Kuroo lol


	8. Breaking Bokuto

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daichi and Suga are back  
> Bokuaka is here too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING  
> mentions of sexual assault

Sugawara's POV  
Daichi and I are just sitting on the couch, cuddling when we hear the news say something we would have never expected.

"Breaking news, former local Tsukishima Kei has been jailed for 4 years with no parol after the attempted murder or Kuroo Tetsuro, we are outside the court after the trial, here we have another former local, Hinata Shoyo, and Tetsuro's best friend Kenma Kozume who were the main witnesses to the situation"

I see Hinata who looks, how should I put it, emotionless, he looks like he doesn't care.

"Hello, I'm Hinata Shoyo *winks* thank you for having me and, um, this person, anyways the medical report has came back and the hye- Kuroo is fine, just a little coma never hurt anybody *chuckles* um sorry where were we.

Oh yes, my boyfriend was sexually assaulted by Tetsuro after some harsh words were shared, Tetsuro believed that Tsukki had a thing for him, so Tetsuro kissed Tsukishima on the lips and fondled his lower region, Tsukishima had had enough and fought back, kicking him to the ground, at that point Kuroo had passed out but Tsukishima's rage got a hold of him and while This person and I dialled the police, tsukishima stopped, realising what he did, but never feeling guilty, as he was sexually assaulted, thank you for your time" hinata says it all with a grin

"Wow kid, you should join the broadcasting company, you speak very eloquently, oh anyways, there you have it, straight to the point, thanks you two, and stay safe everybody, goodnight"

Me and Daichi lock worried eyes, confused at the whole situation, why wouldn't Hinata refer to Kenma by his name, something must of happened.

My suspicion quickly leaves as I realise that Hinata will be on his own, I'm worried for him, I wish he could be with Daichi and I, we would test him so much better then that criminal

I decide to text Hinata, Daichi and I still are speechless, I guess we will talk later.

Sugawara  
Hey Hinata, just saw the local news and you were on it, are you okay?  
Read at 22:55 (10:55 pm)

Maybe I should just call him

Contacts-Hinata💝-Message-CALL

As I hear the dial tone, for one run through he doesn't pick up, then straight after I don't hear it again, yes, he picked up

"Hinata, are you ok-"

This number has you blocked.

My last option is Instagram, he can't have blocked me there, why would he even block me

@sugaslife  
Hinata are you okay, I just saw the news  
Read at 22:59 (10:59pm)

I check his profile to see a bold

User not found

Why did he block me after reading my messages, did I do something wrong, does he hate me? Before I know it tears are running down my cheeks. Fuck, I shouldn't have fallen for him and Daichi.

Hinata's POV  
First day at fukurodani (after 2 periods at nekoma)

Suga was getting on my nerves, at this point it was getting obvious that he liked me, so why not get an easy kill.

Getting into Fukurodani usually requires a scholarship or money but because I threatened to sue the school over trauma charges they allowed me to transfer here.

Knowing Bokuto and Akaashi, they will be obsessed with me being there, luckily I've been planning what I will do to them for ages.

A third year is supposedly walking me around the school, I go to the principals office to get my schedule and see.

"Bokuto?" "SSHOGBVYO!" oh wow isn't he enthusiastic, he runs up to me and hugs me while rambling if I'm going to join the volleyball team, and of course I agree.

I hold out my arm underneath Bokutos body and instruct the principal to hand me my schedule as Bokuto keeps talking.

"So Shoyo what are you doing here, Akaashi and I have started dating recently but for some reason we can't stop thinking about you, do you think about me too, oh sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable, oh talking about feeling uncomfortable there was this one time when akaashi and I were on a walk and he said something really perverted to me and I pinned him down on the ground and people were watching is, how are you doing Shoyo?"

How

Does

He

Breathe

Ugh he's so annoying but so cute without even trying. This might be harder than expected

"Um, Bokuto, have you watched the news recently?" He just gives me a short no, wow didn't know he could speak so little.

"Well in the past month my life has kind of fallen apart, Kageyama, my best friend k-killed himself and we don't know why and my boyfriend went to jail"

"B-boyfriend, j-jail, what happened" wow he really likes me, and he talks so much that I can't even read his mind, because he's already said it all.

"My boyfriend, well ex at the moment but when he gets out who knows, almost beat your best friend Kuroo Tetsuro to death, yknow, I'm surprised you haven't found out" I say, already putting some spice into the cauldron. Stirring the pot lightly isn't bad, right?

"WH-WHAT, KUROO, MY BRO, IS HE OK, I HOPE HES OK, WHAT ABOUT KENMA, WAIT WHY ARE YOU HERE, WHY DID YOUR BOYFRIEND DO THAT TO KUROO, p-please tell me sho-sho" EHHHHH, what did he just call me, it took all of my mental strength not to beat this boy up.

"Well bo-bo, Kuroo sexually assaulted my boyfriend and that flipped his switch, Kuroo is dirt and deserves to die. Sadly he is going to make up out of his coma soon" Bokutos eyes widen, then I realise I just gave up my whole facade in 10 seconds.

"I- I mean" he cuts me off "Shoyo, call me that again" I'm sorry, what the fuck. "Bo-bo?" I say in a questioning tone, why is he like this. He just curtly nods and hugs me "sho-sho me and Akaashi will take care of you, we can be your boyfriends and make you happy and innocent Hinata again, let us help you"

I'm.......... speechless

He wants to....... help me.

It's best to agree I guess.

"Of course you and Akaashi can take care of me bo-bo, I'm sorry I said such harsh words about Kuroo" I let out some 'tears' "the whole situation, court and school moving schools twice in 3 weeks is just really getting to me" I say with a peck on Bokutos cheek.

He just grins and sees Akaashi walking in the hallway. And doesn't he look PISSED to see bokuto hugging someone random.

"Bokuto. Are you cheating on me right now, why would you call me o-" I turn around with sad eyes "SHOYO!?" He yells, that's kind of funny, I've never heard Akaashi yell before.

"AKAGASHIJ, sho-sho moved here after his boyfriend left him-" I stop him there, his story is already twisted. "Bo-bo let me tell my own story please" I say with pleading eyes.

After I explain the whole thing to Akaashi I see him start to tear up, oh wow, these two really do love me.

They would be great lovers to have on my side(s).

I internally chuckle, good one hinata.

They both walk me to class and when they drop me off there (literally must I say, they were both holding me) they both pecked my cheek.

First Tsukki and now the pair known as Bokuaka.

Who else will I actually gain feelings for, this was meant to be a big villainous scheme.

But I guess even villains have hearts at the end of the day.

Chapter end  
Bokuakahina is blooming, but what will hinata do next


	9. Bury me at makeout creek

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just so much depression  
> And Mitski, yay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNINGS  
> MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH  
> FUCKING DEPRESSED PEOPLE  
> CRAZY AMOUNTS OF REPEATED WORDS  
> AND BAD WRITING

Hinata's POV  
I'm not giving up on my plan, even if that means hurting Bokuto or Akaashi.

I decided that fact while being held in Bokuto and Akaashi's arms in Bokutos bed. "seeing Bokuto sleep is amazing, right Hina?" I look up at Akaashi, my hand ushering him to continue, it seems he got the memo as he continues "for such an energetic boy, he looks so peaceful, do you think he dreams of us Hinata?" 

Hinata can see the love in Akaashi's eyes as they wander to Bokuto, then back up to him.

"Hinata, I'm so glad you came here. But not to sound rude, why are you actually here? I know you wouldn't leave Karasuno for no reason" I look at him shocked, he must really analyse everything, creepy.

"My father was abusing me, so I used the money that my grandma left me to move out to Tokyo" I say, telling the truth without filling in the gaps.

"Hinata, come here, I'll protect you, here put a earbud in" he passes me one of his earbuds, and changes the album to our favourite album, be the cowboy by Mitski, on shuffle.

As the song old friend comes on, I hum it it, unconsciously and Akaashi looks at me wide eyes and with his mouth agape, he blurts out "Hinata, you never told me you could sing" and I just shrug and snuggle up to him, not wanting to wake Bokuto.

In the morning  
Hinatas POV

I get woken up by Akaashi and Bokuto talking about some place they want to bring me, but it's meant to be a surprise.

"So, what are you two talking about" I say with a smug grin, they knew I heard everything, they go bright red.

"Well I guess the secrets out, Bokuto-san and I have a special spot where we like to have picnics and kiss at, would you be interested in coming with us today" his eyes tell me that he won't take no for an answer

"Sure Keiji, when are we leaving" he mutters that we're leaving in 10 minutes.

Wow, I didn't think I would get such a golden opportunity this early, let's just check their minds to see how they really feel.

"No thoughts, head empty" - really Bokuto, we're about to go on a date and you can only quote tik toks, I grin as I focus my attention on Akaashi.

"We're going to ask Hinata out and he is going to stay with us forever, these past few days with him have been amazing. He's so perfect" - wow Akaashi really likes us both, I blushed at his statements, don't get me wrong, but I'm surprised, he is usually so inexpressive in person.

Maybe I can use this to my advantage.

Before I know it, the 10 minutes had passes and we were on our way to the car, Bokuto being the gentleman he is, carried everything to the car.

As we arrive I feel strong arms pull me into a chest "you can't see yet sho-sho, wait until we get there and be amazed by my amazing date location skills" 

Akaashi obviously doesn't agree with statement as he mutters something like 'I was the one who showed you this place, bokuto-san' not expecting me to hear.

But I did

Was that bitterness

Nice to know 

Akaashi's POV

I see the stunning scenery in front of me as I see Bokuto lead Hinata to the waterfall that has a 100 meter drop.

I know, I know, blindfold and cliff doesn't sound like the best combination, but I did it to Bokuto so now Hinata gets it.

As I see Bokuto remove hinatas blindfold, I see Hinata gasp, I'm so happy that he likes it, as he walks around I see him wander too close to the cliff.

I run for him, thank god I'm fast enough to catch him, poor Bokuto cant even see us at this point.

As I grab Hinata as he is examining the view, he suddenly speaks in a chilling tone.

"Wow, Akaashi, isn't this view amazing" he says to me, with a cold stare he lets out a fake smile. 

"Yes it is, please can we go back to Bokuto-San now, he might be getting worri-"

"What would you do if this view was your last" he says as he starts backing away.

"Hinata, what are you doing, you're scaring me" I say, my voice is shaking, someone help me.

"I'm surprised that someone you love so much is scaring you" he says with a slight tilt of his head

"W-what" I say, tears slipping out as he lets out a chuckle, "do you love me, KEIJI, would you, DIE FOR ME"

He charges at me

He knocked me off the cliff, I don't scream, I know this is the end.

I feel the impact as hard as rock hit my back. My bones are crushed. I start sinking.

Why am I still alive.

I just sink to the bottom of the creek, once deemed as makeout creek by bokuto and I

The last thought I have is.

"I love you Bokuto."  
.  
"I forgive you, hinata, get better and see me in heaven if it's not too late"

It all goes black

I take in one final gasp of water as darkness overtakes me.

Bokuto's POV

At this point I'm getting worried, neither of my loves have returned.

As I usually do, I assume the worst. 

I hear sobbing and footsteps coming towards me, I open my eyes, it's Hinata.

"H-hinata, where is Akaashi" he looks at me and let's out a pained sob, clearly something happened.

"He was- he was trying to get me away from the cliff when one piece of rock collapsed and I nearly fell, he caught me, but he pushed me back onto stable ground, he- he took the fall for me Bokuto" he says and let's out so,e of the most bone chilling sobs I have ever heard.

"W-Wait, maybe Akaashi still has a chance, do you have your phone, call the ambulance and some police" he just nods and dials them.

We were trying to help you Hinata.

Now we have broken you even further.

I apologise for that, love.

As police arrive Hinata describes the entire situation to them in complete detail twice, not forgetting anything either time, without a motive or suspicion he was cleared, thank god, I don't know what I would do if Hinata had any involvement in this.

I just know he had nothing to do with it. We all loved eachother, now it's just me and Hinata.

Akaashi will look over us and keep us from trouble.

Right?

Hinatas POV

As Akaashi's body was Recovered form the body of water, I cried I to Bokutos shoulder, no fake crying anymore, I just killed someone I love, for no reason but being crazy.

Father would be proud, I've become even worse than him and that bastard that raped me.

I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi, I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed AkaashiI killed Akaashi,,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi,I killed Akaashi.

I killed an innocent man, I'm a monster, I loved him and I killed him, he was trying to save me and I killed him, I killed him, it should have been me.

I killed Akaashi and Kageyama now, one direct one mentally, the guilt is stacking up. Bokuto trusts me, he wants me to stay with him.

I have to leave.

I have to go.

I don't think I belong here.

Sugawara's POV

'Today, we mourn the loss of fukurodani student, Akaashi Keiji. Who died in the most tragic of circumstances, saving the one he loved, Hinata Shoyo, from a fatal cliff fall, here is Bokuto Kotaro, who was also in a relationship with Keiji before this accident, with the details."

"Hi, I'm bo-kuto, I w-was aka-ashis boyfriend and he died by sav-saving this boy, our boyfriend, Hinata Shoyo *camera pans at hinata, who has red eyes and is crying his heart out, clinging to bokuto, obvious self harm on his arms* we were surprising Hinata with an area of a national park that Akaashi first asked me out in, we planned to make it official with Hinata.

From what the police told me, Hinata was so exited that he got sidetracked by the view, that he never noticed how unstable the cliff underneath him was. As the cliff collapsed underneath him, Keiji swooped in, and threw hinata to the ground, H-he fell to his death and- and when we found his body everything was purple and all of his bones were crushed.

Rest In Peace, baby"

As the tv shows the solemn picture of Bokuto and Hinata clinging to eachother, crying their hearts out as the camera went back to the news presenter. 

I didn't care.

I know Hinata has me blocked, but I don't care.

I go out and buy a brand new SIM card, so I can call Hinata, even if it's anonymously.

I dial his number.

I hesitate as I hear the dial tone.

"H-hello, who's call-c-calling"

Chapter end   
This was fucking sad as fuck to write  
Also this chapters name is a Mitski reference. She was littered in this chapter.


	10. Gentle Earthquakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No Angst, character development and crying  
> Also aoba johsai, YES

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember to follow my Instagram and dm me if you want to know what I have in store  
> @william.marinn

Hinata's POV

The past few weeks I have just been laying with Bokuto in bed, only getting up when necessary.

I never expected to feel guilty, this is not how it should have went.

I have to leave Bokuto before I hurt him. 

I get up, sleeps like a rock so I know I won't be able to wake him up, even if I shove him.

I plant a kiss on his forehead.

And walk out of the door.

"Bye Bo-Bo, maybe we can meet again" I whisper.

As I'm on the way to the bus stop I hear my phone ring.

Unknown caller ID

What do I have to lose.

"H-hello, who's call-c-calling" I stutter out, not used to talking

"Hinata, are you ok?, it's Suga, where are you, I saw the news, you've been on twice, for Kuroo and Akaashi, why did you block me, I miss you so much?" What is he doing, I'm dangerous.

"S-Suga, I thought I blocked you" 

I hear a cry from the other side of the line, oh fuck, I made him cry.

"H-Hinata, why did you block me, don't you know how much I love you, please come back, I'll protect you" I flinch, that's what Akaashi and Bokuto said to me.

"Suga, I can't go back. Not yet. I'm transferring out of Fukurodani because 0f what just happened. But I can't come back to Karasuno." I blurt out, I'm not even sure why I don't want to, maybe I'm scared of how they will treat me.

Oh wait I forgot about my father, yeah, fuck no, I'm not going back.

I just hang up. I can't deal with him, I can't deal with anyone right now. I feel too guilty to talk to Suga, He is too worried about me, he just confessed to me. Why does everyone love me, I'm a monster.

It feels like I'm playing the Russian roulette of schools at this point, who's fate is sealed next.

Aobajohsai, that seems like the next best option, maybe the grand king can help me, he seems pretty crazy too.

Time skip to next Monday (first day at seijoh)  
Hinata's POV

As my transfer to Aobajohsai starts today, I feel the pit in my stomach grow bigger.

Bokuto has been texting and calling me non-stop, I have only responded once to tell him that I'm okay and I just needed some time to myself.

Lying to Bokuto hurts me more than it should, but I know I'd end up hurting him in some way if I stayed with him.

I don't think I could deal with something happening to him. He deserves someone better to take care of him.

Someone like Akaashi.

As I walk through the gates of the school I have my head down, not trying to catch any attention.

I hear two familiar voices behind me "Iwa Chan~, I hear there's a new student in first year, how fascinating, I hope they like volle-" suddenly I feel an impact right in the middle of my back.

"Get out of my wa-" I turn to him "CHIBI CHAN!!!, what are you doing here, are you the new student, hang out with me and Iwa" I hear him say, blushing.

REALLY, MORE BLUSHING, MUST BE MY LUCKY FUCKING DAY

Iwaizumi is behind Oikawa, eyes still wide at my appearance "Hinata, what are you doing here" I just sigh.

"I'll explain to you two at lunch, now could you show me where the principals office is" their eyes widen at my demand as they nod, Oikawa looking salty that I didn't greet him.

"Oh and Oikawa, aren't you looking good in normal school uniform" I say with a wink as he goes bright red, so does Iwaizumi, does he want a compliment too? Whatever gets me friends with them I guess.

"Iwa, have your arms gotten bigger since our last practice match, your looking like you could pin Oikawa down right now if you want-" he goes bright red as I cling to his arm and he puts his hand over my mouth. 

Aren't they easy, how cute.

I think I want to stay with them for a bit. Get my mind off of the people that I have hurt.

As I get my schedule I walk to my class with Oikawa as Iwaizumi didn't want to be late.

Let's just say the first few periods were....... interesting.

I was put in the same classes as Kunimi and Onion Head as surprisingly we got along really well.

Suddenly before I knew it I had 4 friends here that could stand beside me. Maybe they can make me a better person.

God I hope so. I can't afford a medical diagnosis, I can barely afford staying in a house, my apartment was cleared out during my times with Bokuto and Akaashi, because we were planning to move in together.

It's my fault that we can't, if I wasn't a terrible person, I would be with them right now, in between both their chests, hugging me.

I feel the tears threaten to fall. No, I can't cry, not in front of Kunimi and Kindaichi.

They will think I'm a los-

"Hinata-chan, you look sad, do you need a hug" I hear Kunimi say, I just nod and he squeezes me tightly.

I'm not going to take advantage of him, no mind reading, no nothing, this is genuine.

Before I know it, I'm smiling and by Kunimi's body language, he's smiling too.

I don't deserve this. At all.

When it's lunchtime I walk out of the classroom, to se Iwaizumi and Oikawa waiting for me outside the classroom.

It's time to explain everything to them.

And when I mean everything I mean after the editing. I can't have them hate me.

"So I decided to move out of Karasuno because my father was abusing me, and my best friend killed him self a day after saying that he had feelings for me my mother supplied me funding for an apartment in Tokyo so I moved there. At this point Tsukishima and I were dating.

When we got to Tokyo we decided we should go to Nekoma, becauseI was close to Kenma at the time and, um, Tsukki and Kuroo had..... history.

It turns out, that If you sexually assault someone, you're going to get hit, Kuroo fondled Tsukishimas penis so Tsukishima nearly beat him to death.

After the court trial I realised I wouldn't be able to stay at Nekoma so they said they could make an exception and fit me in with fukurodani

During my time at Fukurodani, Bokuto, Akaashi and I grew close, and on the day they were meant to ask me out, a freak accident occurred" 

I feel the tears well up in my eyes again, fuck, I was not ready to talk about this.

"I was going to see the view of a cliff, and before I nearly slipped, Akaashi saved me, pushing me back onto solid ground, but he- he- he took the fall and died"

As I start sobbing uncontrollably I feel two sets of arms wrap around me.

Then three.

Then four.

Kunimi and Kindaichi heard all of it, and they still hug me.

"Chi- no- hinata, do you want to join the volleyball team with us, we will make you happy and maybe at some point we can help you with Bokuto, We will make you happy again" I hear oikawa say, as I'm crying to much to speak, I just nod into his chest.

I don't deserve this support, but damn, I think I needed it.

Chapter end  
Spoiler for future chapters, hinata will stay at seijoh  
Will hinata do a full 180, or will he go back to his old ways, keep reading to find out   
If you enjoyed please vote and comment


	11. Make me feel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sad, happy, sad, shock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Janelle monae ref  
> This chapter is not just focused on hinata  
> It’s very focused on the other important characters

Bokuto's POV   
Did I do something wrong? Why did he leave me? Was I not good enough?

I miss him so much, he was the only person that was with me and now he's moved..... again.

I'll give him as much time as he needs. Because he is so worth it.

Life goes on normally for everyone but me, school is so empty without Akaashi's nagging and Hinata's well.... hinata-ness.

To Hinata 💕😩  
Are you ok baby, if you need to talk I'm here for you. Please call me so I know you're alright, I need to hear your voice.

From Hinata 💕😩  
We can call after school, I'll explain where I went, I miss you to Bo-bo.

To Hinata 💕😩  
You just made me so exited, I love you still, make sure you remember that

I get off my phone after I see he left me on read, saddened at the fact that the conversation was only 3 sentences. But so exited that he agreed to talk to me. I wonder what school he moved to.

I'm going to fix us, Hinata.

Hinata's POV 

The school day goes quickly, too quickly for my liking. I'm feeling guiltier and guiltier by the minute.

Oikawa signals me over to him. Oh I forgot about volleyball practice.

"Oikawa, I'm going to be late for practice, I'm going to call Bokuto" I say. He grins at me.

"Chibi chan~ I'm so proud of you. Tell me how it goes during practice" he leaves me with a swift turn on his heels.

He struts like a runway model, how cute- 

My thoughts are interrupted by my ringtone, which for some reason is still just a default. Boring.

"Hi, Are you ok Hinata, where are you, can we go on FaceTime, I miss your face so much, it's so hard being here without you or Aka-" 

"Bokuto!" 

"What, babe"

"I- I'm so sorry for leaving you at your worst, I just couldn't stand seeing you so hurt, I moved to Aobajohsai with Oikawa and Iwaizumi, they are helping me get better. Just wait, I'll call you back on FaceTime"

I jump off the call and quickly go onto his contact, I click FaceTime, he picks up straight away.

"HINATA YOU LOOK SO MUCH BETTER, I'm so proud of you! I missed your face so much that I dreamt about it, and you know how when I dream I dream for long, copious amounts of time, well this was in the middle of class and I just thought 'I wonder how hinatas doing' so I just daydreamed of you for 2 periods, no one could snap me out of it."

I just let him continue as I chuckle to myself, how can he be so adorable. While he's still rambling I examine his face further, I see dark under eye bags and his cheeks are puffy.

"Bokuto, call me everyday, I promise I will pick up now, and now that I'm back playing volleyball I can finally beat Fukurodani!" I say playfully with a big grin, I'm happy.

"Yes I'll call you everyday, I'm so happy you're- wait, you think you're going to beat us that easily, no you aren't, please don't use my weakness against me, I trust you" he says, oh no, this is steering into emo mode Bokuto direction.

Time to regain control "Bokuto, Seijoh has a practice match against Fukurodani in 3 weeks, we can see eachother and maybe, you know, do something else" I wink at him, I see his owl like face go bright red.

"Hi-hinata, don't flirt with me in public" I laugh at that statement "Bokuto I'm going to have to go and do practice, text me tonight" I wink and he blushed even redder.

"Ok Hinata, miss you, love you, byeeeeee" as I see his face leave my phone I feel happy.

My passion for volleyball just went up 100%, I want to beat Bokuto. Oikawa is going to be so exited.

Oikawa's POV

I want the best for Hinata, and right now that is Bokuto, he couldn't have chosen someone sweeter.

I would have been jealous 3 weeks ago if you said Hinata liked Bokuto and not me, and so would have Iwa chan, but us two kind of bonded over our feelings for Hinata.

And honestly, I have to thank Hinata for it, when we tell him of course.

Iwaizumi and I are just trying to be the best friends to Hinata, if that means hugging him, that's what it means. If that means kissing his forehead to comfort him platonically. That's perfectly fine, as long and we're both happy.

My train of thought is snapped when I hear the gyms door slam, and I see Hinata looking the happiest I've ever seen him.

And that's a large standard to pass.

He always shocks me, he's so ever changing it's kind of scary.

"OIKAWA, it went so well, we are going to talk again tonight, I'm so exited to beat Fukurodani, and see Bokuto!" He jumps up and down, I just smile softly as I realise, He's back, Hinatas back 

After practice, at the oikawa household   
Oikawa's POV 

Every week I decide to look over my middle school pictures, just to reflect on what type of person I was.

Today I found an album called 'friends' and the only two people other than myself that are in it are Iwa and Tobio-Chan.

When I found out that Tobio had killed myself, I truly thought it was my fault, he always looked up to me and I always treated him like trash.

I was always jealous of how little he had to work on being flawless to be flawless when I has these large outliers that set me apart from the rest.

Tobio was almost better at me than everything and he was 2 years younger than me, but one area that I always had him was socialising.

I always ridiculed him in middle school, almost punching him many times but he stuck around.

And when he needed someone most, I couldn't be there.

I need to visit him

I get in the car, I know it's a long drive but I have to do this, I have to apologise to him.

He needs to know, he needs to know that I cared for him.

I just hope that he hears me, I hope he forgives me, I hope I didn't go too far last time.

As I get out of the car, I walk into the cemetery, the guards are looking at me funny.

I walk past so many names before seeing him, it is really quite anxiety inducing seeing how many dead bodies are right next to me.

He's on the peak of the hill, overlooking the ocean. As soon as I walk up to his grave I feel a strong presence.

"Tobio-Chan, is that you, I'm here to say my final apologies to you, you deserve it"  
I feel the presence move onto my hand and before I know it somethings in my hand.

"You- you want me to read this, right Tobio" I feel the presence relax and sit next to where I was sitting.

I quickly realise that this is his suicide note. God please say something to me, even if it's 'I hate you you self centred prick' just say something to me.

'To Iwaizumi'

'To Yamaguchi'

'To oikawa-senpai' 

I smile at where I feel the presence is, it feels like he's ushering me to read it.

'To oikawa senpai,   
I always thought of you as a best friend and a brother, even when you bullied me in middle school, or called me a fag, or punched me, I always thought of you as my brother,  
I just wanted to write something for you, I know you never cared for me but I sure did for you.  
Oikawa, please make it to nationals, please win them for me, I think Hinata is going to go to your school, so please win them with him.  
I forgive you for everything you have ever done, when you reach heaven with me we will be the kings.  
I love you oikawa, even if you don't love me back  
-your precious kouhai Kageyama.

Before I know tears are running down my face, he forgives me, he loved me, I need to speak.

"Kageyama" I feel the presence move towards me "I always loved you like a brother too, I'm so sorry for everything, for the bullying, for the harsh words and the physical abuse, I did it because I was jealous, jealous of your talent, your wit, and your personality"

I feel the presence wiping my tears.

"I have always had the shittest personality, I was jealous of your innocence and weirdly enough, your idiocy, I wish I was you so I treated you like dirt, even though you still treated me well. We will win nationals for you."

As I feel the presence get lighter, I look over to the hill.

There I see Kageyama waving, small smile on his tear covered face before he opens his mouth.

"Tell hinata that Akaashi forgives him, I love you oikawa, now it's finally time to go" he waves.

Back home  
Oikawa's POV

I need to call hinata, to tell him to get here right now.

He is one person I can definitely talk to about this.

I press his contact and call him

He picks up after 2 rings

"Hinata, come here, I have something to tell you about"

"Um.... ok!, when?"

"Now, please"

Chapter end   
Some sad, happy, sad for you guys


	12. EL MAL QUERER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa might die who knows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translation of the chapter name is “evil will” and is the name of one of my favourite albums from ROSALÍA, please correct me if that translation is wrong though.

Hinata's POV  
As I run to Oikawa's house from the hotel as fast as I can my heart races.

What could it be, he sounded too panicked to be fine.

As I reach his door I see that his car is the only one in the driveway. I also ogle at the fact that this is a FUCKING MANSION

it's bigger than oikawa's ego.

I chuckle at that as I knock, the door opens immediately as I am greeted with a red eyed puffy cheeked Oikawa.

The crazy part of me wants to take advantage of his situation.

I have to be better than that, for Bokuto.

"Hinata, this might sound weird to ask, but do you believe in spirits and ghosts?" I just nod curtly, confused on why he would even ask a question like that.

"I went to see Kageyama today, and I felt him there, he handed me his letter to me. And you know what I heard him say to me.

"Tell Hinata that Akaashi forgives him" Oikawa finishes, I flinch, I can't imagine what Oikawa's thinking about me right now.

Oh wait, I kinda can

'This is pretty tough stuff, I hope he takes it well' 

Oh thank fuck for his oblivious-ness. Literally what else could Akaashi have meant by saying that.

At this point I feel it coming, the thing I've feared ever since moving here.

I suddenly feel myself lose all control of my body, suddenly I am a bystander in this crazy situation, locked inside my own head.

"Oikawa~ what do you think that means" I can feel my head tilt.

I've never felt like this, last time this happened I blacked out, and that ended up with Akaashi dying.

I need to stop this, I know it's me doing this but I feel like I have no control.

I can't kill Oikawa, all he has been doing is helping me.

I see him shudder in fear under my gaze as 'I' edge closer to him.

"Hinata, what's w-wrong, what are you doing" he says in complete fear of me, his shoulders are shaking and he is at the point of tears.

His eyes widen as it seems he realises something.

"You killed Akaashi, didn't you, that's what's Kageyama meant, you murde-"

'I' cut him off with a kiss, purely for the the purpose of shutting him up.

"STAY THERE OIKAWA, I NEED TO GET SOMETHING, IF YOU MOVE ILL KILL YOU" I scream.

That was the real me.

No more excuses, no more blaming it on control, I just said that.

I see rope, gloves and a sock to use as a blindfold in the basement of Oikawa's house. Lucky I listened to a song on how to tie a noose.

"OIKAWA COME DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW" as I see his head peek in I grab him, shocking him with my strength as I wrap a blindfold around him. 

"You feel this chair, get up onto it and stand on it, I have a little surprise for you." As he does what I say I grin.

I've truly lost my mind.

I wrap the noose around his neck, obviously Oikawa thinks I'm doing something else because he moans.

He fucking moans.

If I wasn't bat shit crazy I would have helped him with something else. Tok bad I'm a whole nutcase. 

I don't even bother warning him as I yank the chair from underneath him, aswell as removing the blindfold from his eyes.

As I walk up to the stairs from the basement I see him turn his head to me and gives me one last smile as he chokes out his final words, or should I say sentence.

"Hinata, I promise if we meet in the afterlife I will have forgiven you" I heads, expecting a response.

"Oikawa-Chan!" I start, feeling the tears run down my face, I did it again. "Treat Akaashi and Kageyama to some social classes, and tell them I'm sorry, I love you, I just couldn't have you dobbing me into the police, you know how it is, and if I see you in the afterlife, I'll let you do anything to me for a day, goodbye, Oikawa Tooru" I cry out.

I remove all of the DNA evidence by burning it. Making it look like a suicide.

While I burn the blindfold I cry, this is the second time I've killed someone with my bare hands for no reason. 

Not only that, this is the second time I have killed someone who loved me more than I deserved.

I am able to write a small suicide note, copying Oikawa's handwriting perfectly.

I walk back down to the basement, seeing Oikawa's lifeless body hanging from the ceiling, I blow him a kiss and I place the note under his body.

I love you Oikawa, I really doubt there will be any way I'll make it to heaven to see you or the others, but I will find a way, I've been improvising my whole life, I won't stop now.

Iwaizumi's POV

Oikawa hasn't responded to me in 7 hours, I start to get worried.

He could be having one of his depressive episodes over Kageyama, I should head over to his house to see if he's alright.

When I arrive at his, uhm,let's say generous sized house, I have the gut feeling that something is wrong.

I walk um to the door and see that it's already unlocked.

"Shittykawa, are you ok?" I yell

No response.

The air feels cool as I walk through the house to look for him. Then I notice that his basement door is open.

As I walk in I see the most horrific scene I could ever think of seeing.

Oikawa Tooru, my boyfriend hanging from the ceiling.

Like any normal person, my first reaction is to call the person who I trust the most.

Hinata. I click on his contact as I run around the house frantically screaming.

He picks up straight away.

"Iwaizumi, what's wrong, shouldn't you be in be-" I cut him off

"HINATA HES DEAD, OIKWAW KIL *sob* KILLEDDSWWX"

I hear a gasp as I hear sobs on the other side of the line, at least Hinata understands me.

"I-Iwaizumi, please listen to me, call the police and ambulance, do what you can, stay by him, he loved you so much I-Iwa" I hear Hinata say, his sobs almost make me unable to understand.

'OK HI- I mean o-ok Hinata, please get some rest, meet me tomorrow, I need you to comfort me, I need you" I say, not caring if I sound needy.

"Ok Iwa" I hear the line go silent.

The police take his body away because the ambulance couldn't feel a pulse. 

The love of my life just killed himself and I couldn't help with anything.

Oikawa's POV

Oh wow, so this is what it looks like.

The gates of heaven are large, white and omit a pearlescent glow.

As soon as I walk through the gate I hear two familiar voices speak to me.

"It was Hinata, right?"

Chapter end   
I promise the only dead people won't just be setters at the end.  
Also, did we really think hinata would change this early.  
So, hinata is fighting with mental illness. I'm thinking of a few that he is struggling with.  
I will educate myself to the best of my abilities before I include any of these.  
D.I.D  
Depression  
Bipolar  
Anxiety  
So yeah, that bitch is fucked yo, include his abusive past and past experience with rape, he is a whole ball of fucked up.  
Such a complex character, so fun to write.  
Love you Sm- william


	13. New leaders(s)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa’s ghost says boo  
> Makki and Mattsun are the new captains of Seijoh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not a religious person by any means  
> None of this is fact, it’s just fun to write  
> You can decide who the leader of heaven is. I think it’s oikawa now.

Hinata's POV

Oikawa's death brought uproar to his fans, I could barely walk in the street without hearing his name being mentioned.

More than he was alive, which was already heaps.

Also the burial of Oikawa officially means that I am a serial killer, two people in less than a month.

Everyone that I've hurt. Kuroo, Kageyama, Oikawa, Akaashi and evening Tsukishima.

None of them deserved it. I can't bare to image how Tsukishima is being treated in prison. I did that to him, I made him go to Nekoma to me, I knew what he wanted to do and never stopped him.

And I even lead Kenma on, I was one of the only people he trusted and I broke that trust by verbally harassing him along with kissing him while knowing his feelings for me.

I've ignored everyone from Karasuno aswell, I left them right after Kageyama died.

I truly am a terrible person. What would Bokuto think, What would Iwa, Kunimi and Kindaichi think.

What would the people who trusted me with their lives on Karasuno think.

As I make it into class, the energy is as flat as oikaw- too soon?

The energy is as flat as Lana del Ray's one note music.

Not a smile was in sight, girls and boys all around the school has puffy eyes and red faces.

None looked as broken as Iwaizumi, I didn't go and see him the day after and haven't talked to him since. 

I felt too guilty to.

He walks up to me and engulfs me in his arms as I feel him start to sob "hi-na-ta, I- why couldn't you come and s-see me, I need-needed you" I just rub circles in his back

"Iwa, it hurts me seeing you like this, and I wanted to be strong for you and I wasn't strong then. Please please please forgive me. I'm sorry" I say, I just see him give me a sad smile and nod until he puts his head in the crook of my neck.

"Hinata, who will play setter for us, we still need to win nationals, we need to win for Oikawa, it will be hard but we have to win it, he said it in his note" I flinch at the mention of the note.

The note that I wrote, I remember mentioning that oikawa wouldn't let Iwaizumi into heaven if we didn't get into nationals.

I just peck his forehead as we split up, before I can leave he just squeezes me and pecks my forehead back.

Oikawa's POV

So Kageyama and Akaashi explained to me that I am able to go back down to earth to fix one unresolved issue.

The selfish part of me wants to get answers from Hinata, I also want to say my final goodbye to Iwa-Chan.

But the leader in me wants to check the volleyball club, I know all of the third years can set amateur-ly apart from Iwaizumi, but I'm more interested in who will take over the leadership role. 

As I walked through the door I feel the auras around me change, as soon as I walked in the door it already seemed lighter.

Like they could sense my presence, just like I felt Kageyama's at his grave. I see Hinata look directly at where I am. He looks like he's been crying, I can basically feel the guilt was over him as he 'sees' me.

Unless..... he actually can?

I suddenly see Makki and Mattsun brighten up.

Seems like I've found the new leaders of Seijoh.

"GUYS" Makki starts "I know we just lost our setter and good friend, Oikawa Tooru, but that should make us all closer as a group. According to Iwaizumi, Oikawa's final wish was for us to make it to nationals. We won't just make the, we will win them, FOR OIKAWA!" I hear both of them yell, and then the rest of the team joins in in the chant and goes along with practice.

Mattsun has taken over setting, he isn't a genius by any standards but he can pinpoint Hinata and Iwaizumi quite well. He will only get better.

Speaking of hinata, he has taken the middle blocking spot, I see his shine in his eyes as he hits the ball.

I know I shouldn't but I forgive him.

I don't think I was ever angry about it anyway. Just disappointed.

Hinata's POV

Oikawa was watching the whole practice, I could see him for some reason, he was in what he wore when he died.

When Makki and Mattsun took control I could see his face soften, looking like a proud mother.

I never wanted practice to end, because at the end of the day I knew he was here to get answers.

I had clean up duty alone, and just before I was going to lock up I see oikawa in front of the door.

"Can we talk?" His voice sounds hollow and lifeless, I almost burst out in tears at his voice.

"You want an explanation, I don't really have many reasons for taking your life Oikawa, I just knew that you knew about me killing Akaashi so I tried to protect myself, I'm so sorry, I wish I died instead of Kageyama, if I did then you, Akaashi and Kags would still be alive, Kuroo wouldn't be in a coma and Kenma and the whole of Karasuno wouldn't be depressed, Oikawa I am not asking for you to forgive me, because I know it's too late and- and you're- dead, I just wanted to apologise" I say, I've never felt more genuine in my life

I see his face start mimicking tears as he wasn't a physical form, "Hinata, I forgive you just please, don't kill anyone else, I don't want to lose you too, do as you please but try, for me".

I try to cut him off, but he keeps going "Akaashi and Kageyama forgive you too, Akaashi wants to see Bokuto but hasn't had the guts to see him, heh, because he's dead, anyways, Hinata, I love you, win nationals for me" and with a wink, Oikawa Tooru's presence on the earth is none but a ditch on the ground.

Chapter end   
Next chapter it's Seijoh vs Fukurodani then we go onto the real matches.  
Will hinata listen time Oikawa's advice, or will he snap again, find out next episode of total, drama, ACTION


	14. Volleyball, oh I still do that

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Losing is the new losing  
> Kenbokuhina might happen who knows  
> Maybe Tsukki wants To join   
> Who else omg  
> Poor Iwa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow my Instagram and Wattpad  
> Insta - @william.marinn  
> Wattpad- @kodzukenstan

Hinata's POV  
As Fukurodani shows up to our high school, ready to practice, from the side of my eye I see Bokuto running..... no..... charging at me.

I feels his big arms wrap around me, he feels like home.

"Bokuto, I missed you" 

"I missed you too, now it's time for me to kick your ass in volleyball then we can have a date before we have to leave, alright" I just give him a curt nod as I head back to the team.

After the match

For our first game without our captain. Our setter we put up quite a good fight.

They beat us in straight sets of 31-29 and 25-22, I was just generally amazed at how well we did.

We probably would have won with Oikawa, I don't know how we are going to get into nationals without him, but we're going to try our god damn hardest.

Anyways Bokuto and I go on that date he promised, we ended up going to the planetarium, it was so romantic, he makes me forget all the bad I did.

Bokuto is an angel and I'm a monster, I don't deserve him.

Time skip to the qualifiers.  
Hinatas POV

We're here, we have to win 4 matches to make it into the nationals.

I don't know if we can do it, we have already won the first three, the first was against a depleted Karasuno, without Kageyama or I they struggles immensely, the scores turning out to be 25-10 and 25-11. I felt too guilty to go up to them after the game so I went with Iwa to scout out or next opponents.

It happened to be date tech, seeing Aone was nice, he seemed to always understand me.

They won the first set 33-31 but we took back the next two with 25-23 and 25-20, after the match Aone looked crushed, so me being the, um, outgoing person I am I gave him a kiss on the cheek and rubbed his scarily large back. That thing is fucking bigger than me.

Scary.

Anyways, the semi final matches were Aobajohsai vs Wakutani Hugh and Shiratorizawa vs Kesenike high.

Shiratorizawa won their matches 2-1, but we started out way rocky.

Because we were playing with a 'fill in' setter, they found out the simple quick early. So in the first set it was 25-8 their way. The second set didn't start any smoother, with them scoring the first 16 points. Now you and I both are thinking, how the fuck do we win from here.

And I'll tell you.

We don't.

They win the set 25-2.

Twenty fucking five to TWO.

And obviously Shiratorizawa beat Wakutani in straight sets. I'm kind of happy that we didn't get embarrassed by Shiratorizawa, but the feeling isn't any better.

I've failed everyone. Oikawa, I failed him by murdering him and then not even carrying his reputation out properly.

I failed Iwaizumi for not playing well enough to let his final year be one to remember for good reasons.

I failed the third years for reasons stated above aswell.

I failed karasuno for being a coward and not talking to them.

And finally, I failed Bokuto, I promised him on our date that we would play each other in nationals.

I can't speak to anyone because I'm at risk of being locked up in jail for a long time.

Maybe I should, to protect everyone.

I know what I have to do, to protect everyone. And it's not admitting to my past murders.

I need to kill one more person, or get caught in attempt. And go to jail.

I need to text Kenma and apologise as well.

Okay maybe I need to do more than one thing, Kenma first I guess.  
  
To Kenma  
Kenma can we talk.

From Kenma  
I'm out with Kuroo, well, I'm visiting him in his coma, call me later

To Kenma  
Is he ok, hows he recovering.  
I'm so sorry for everything. Leading you on, the verbal abuse and anything else, please forgive me.

From Kenma  
What about during interviews acting like I didn't exist and calling me a thing.  
Do you feel bad for that too.

To Kenma  
I- I don't even remember treating you like that.  
Kenma, if that small apology didn't work I need to get something off my chest.  
Here we go....

Before we first met I was miserable at the way I was being treated like an idiot by people at school, at the way I was being treated at home and at the way that Kaneyama was flirting with me.  
When we met and became friends you were the only person that treated me like a human, not like the sun, not like the only source of happiness in this world, you treated me like a real human being.  
During my whole time at Karasuno before I moves we talked almost every day, and I did grow a crush on you at one point, now I have multiple, you included.  
I appreciate you so much, so much more than every shitty thing I said to you that one day and during the press, I was just scared.  
You don't have to forgive me but I felt this was necessary.

From Kenma  
I- I'm speechless.  
Hinata, of course I forgive you.  
And yes, that was very, very necessary. I still have a crush on you for some stupid reason, will bokuto be okay.

To Kenma  
I'm fucking crying, Kenma, I have so much to talk to you about, I'm so scared.  
You just made me so happy on a shitty day  
Aobajohsai lost in the semi finals today, we wanted to get into those nationals so bad.  
I'm so scared of myself Kenma, I don't know what to do.  
Also to answer your question, Bokuto and I are always looking for others, not as a replacement for Akaashi but we just really enjoy poly.

From Kenma  
If me, u and bokuto go on a date we can see how it goes.  
Why are you scared?  
Also I saw that you lost, the only thing the commentators were talking about was Oikawa.  
What happened?

To Kenma  
Call me, I have a lot of explaining to do.

Chapter end  
Lol you thought they were gonna win, nope, I'm a bitch like that.  
Thanks for reading, vote, like, comment, kudos, whatever. Thanks for the support over the 4 days this has been up, I couldn't that you guys enough.  
Love you. William


	15. Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma kenma KENMA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS CHAPTER IS DEDICATED TO ZAVION DAVENPORT (CHI CHI DEVAYNE) FROM RUPAULS DRAG RACE SEASON 8 AMD AS3, REST IN POWER  
> Okay, I'm not one to do authors notes before because I feel like it's tacky but I want to than you guys for the support this project is receiving, this is my first book and it makes me so happy that some of y'all are enjoying it.

Kenma's POV

I walk out of the hospital after talking to Hinata, he seems really scared at whatever situation he is in.

I don't call him until I arrive home, he picks up immediately, he must have been waiting for me...

Cute 

"K-kenma, h-hello" he stutters out, he seems really nervous, for what is the question.

"Hinata, you have a mountain of explaining to do, I'm not going to interrupt you, just spit it all out" I say monotonously

"Um, s-so it started when I drove Kageyama to suicide" he says. WAIT WHAT.

"Ok I know I said no interruptions but um, explain" I say, almost speechless..... almost.

"So Kageyama has had an obvious crush on me for, um, ages right, but I never felt like that towards him, so I lead him on, consciously must I add, I was aware of what I was doing. When he confessed to me I rejected him and beat him up. And 1 day later he was pronounced dead by suicide"

"Hinata that's terrib-" 

"wait, stop, there's more"

"After I saw how sad everyone, I wondered why I didn't feel say, instead I felt happy. I know, crazy right. So then I tried to manipulate Tsukki but we ended up liking eachother so the whole nekoma situation happened. Wait, you probably want more on that too. So I never had anything against you I was just with Tsukki, who happened to have a whole truckload against Kuroo, so when Kuroo sexually harassed Tsukki he just lost it"

"Ok now that your done Hinata, what els-" 

'NOPE, sorry I mean nope, I'm not done yet, but this is where I have to ask if i can trust you enough to not dob me in to the police"

"WAIT WHAT, HINATA THE POLICE, WHAT. THE. FUCK. DID. YOU. DO"

"I- I'm getting there, so when I moved to Fukurodani, Bokuto and Akaashi were helping me be happy without Tsukki, then we all caught feelings yada yada, so they were going to bring me to a cliff to have a picnic, but when I was with Akaashi near the edge I snapped and I- and I pushed him off" he finished, I could hear the tears in his eyes when he confessed his last part.

"Th-that can't be true Hinata, the police report said there was no foul play on his body"

"That's because when his body was recovered it was smashed, bloodied, bruised. He was completely broken, but this time I didn't feel happy, I felt depressed, that I did that to someone I loved, you probably think I should be in jail right, because I sure do"

I take in a deep breath "Hinata, I don't think you were mentally ok when you did that, please promise you won't do anyth-" 

"Too late, Kenma, you said you heard about Oikawa's suicide, I hung him, he found out about what I did to Akaashi and I snapped again and made it look like a suicide, and Oikawa, being the always good at heart person he is, went up to me as a ghost and forgave me, his murderer, Kenma, should I tell the police? To protect everyone else, I don't want to hurt you, or Bokuto, or Iwaizumi any more than I have"

"Meet me in Tokyo tomorrow and come back to my place, invite Bokuto and explain everything to him aswell, I think he'd rather hear it from you than the police if you confess, right Hinata? Oh and also I'm going to fight for you, I know you don't have enough money for a lawyer but I sure do, o am going to fight"

I hear his heavy sobs on the other side of the line, "I just hope Bokuto can forgive me, and then we can be happy, I love you Kenma, OH WAIT IM SORRY FOR SAYING THAT IT MAKES IT SOUND LIKE IM MANIPULATING YOU IM SORRY IM NOT PLEASE FORGI-"

"I love you too, Shoyo"

I hang up.

Tomorrow will be, um, interesting.

Hinata's POV

To Bokuto💝🦉  
Meet me at Kenmas house tomorrow, I need to tell you something.

From Bokuto💝🦉  
Oh, um, ok, I'm exited to see you ❤️ 

To Bokuto💝🦉  
I hope you still say that tomorrow, love you 

From Bokuto💝🦉  
???, well anyways I have practice soon, so sad I'm not gonna beat ur ass at nationals lol, barrack for me.  
LOVE YOU TOO 💝💝💝❤️💝❤️💝💝🦉🦉💝💝❤️❤️💝❤️💝💝💝❤️❤️❤️❤️💕💕💝💝💝😍😍

To Bokuto💝🦉  
I hope that's not the final Time you say that to me.

Tomorrow is going to be scary 

Chapter end   
Ily guys so much.  
Sorry for the shorter chapter  
Remember to vote, comment, kudos, like and follow me for updates


	16. Dream of you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THIS CHAPTER IS ALSO DEDICATED TO CHI CHI DEVAYNE, LOVE YOU, REST IN POWER

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song mentioned in this is called dream of you by Tessa violet. Such an underrated star   
> Sorry if this makes no sense if you have any concerns comment them please, I love responding to comments.

Hinatas POV

I'm so scared. Kenma's reaction surprised me, but telling bokuto is a different poison that I don't think I'm ready to try, but I have to.

As I show up at Kenma's house I notice that Bokuto's car is already there, damn you rich kids with cars.

I wait outside the door for 5 minutes, considering if I should really go in or just quit now.

Before I know it I feel my body move to knock on the door, I feel the door open and I feel arms wrap around me.

Kenma?

Oh wait of course it's Kenma, he's the only one that knows.

I feel his lips go to my ears as he whispers "if you don't want to tell him I can while you wait out here"

"N-No Kenma, I need to tell him myself, just can you please stay with me no matter what reaction he has"

"Of course Shoyo" as he let's me go I see Bokuto behind us, grinning at us hugging, I run up to him and hug him too, this could be the last time he lets me in his arms.

I fear for his reaction after I tell him I took the love of our lives out of it.

"B-bokuto, I need to tell you something I've been keeping from everyone, I told Kenma yesterday and he says it's best to tell you, you can hate me after I tell you and I promise that will be a totally fair response.

As I let go I see him frown "Is there something wrong with you Hinata?, are you sick?" I just let out a sad chuckle as I continue "maybe sick in the head, anyways please let me explain it all, or walk out halfway through, even slap me or kill me, i don't care I deserve it"

I see him open his mouth to speak but I cut him off with the blatant truth.

"Bokuto, I killed Akaashi"

Bokutos POV

I try to object, to tell him that he is a good person and that I would never slap him for any reason.

Until I hear those four words come out of his mouth 

"Bokuto, I killed Akaashi"

"No you didn't, he fell, don't blame yours-"

"No, Bokuto. I pushed him off the cliff, I saw him try to save me and I saw the opportunity to push him and I took it"

I try to take his words in as well as I can, I can barely process my own thoughts right now, I think I'm still in denial.

He killed Akaashi on purpose, Hinata killed my Akaashi, my Hinata killed my Akaashi.

"B-bokuto, are y-y0u ok, d-do you need to breathe in a p-paper bag?" I just nod as my breathing quickens, I'm hyperventilating.

No.

I'm having a panic attack.

Kenma and Hinata have been sitting around me as I've slowly started to calm down, I think of how I need to confront Hinata on what he said to me.

After I completely calm down, I open my mouth, now knowing what I have to say.

"Hinata, we are going to go to the police station together and we are going to fight for the lowest case possible, I definitely forgive you but I can't let you get away with what you've done, I hope you understand"

For some reason he smiles in a ?happy? Way "Bokuto, this is such a good reaction, I was going to go to the station after this but having you there will help me, if you want to punch me or slap me, please do it because I deserve it"

I stop him there with a kiss, to shut him up.

After our lips seperate I slap him across the face, he saw it coming but didn't dodge.

Let's just say I apologised too many times for that.

two weeks later. Hinata has put himself in and his jury deemed him guilty, but because of his lack of mental stability and, well, strong lawyers, his sentence was downed from 10 years of prison to 2 years of a police bodyguard following him, and monthly police and psychiatric checkups for the rest of his life.

During the two years he decided it would be best for him to not see any of his friends, as he made international news for his confession to murder, he thought no one would want to see him.

He did the rest of his schooling from home and the only person he was ever social with became his guard.

"Well" hinata thought, "its time for university, oh and also time to say goodbye to this guard, I'll miss you Carlos"

2 years later   
Hinatas POV

As soon as I was let out of police custody, I saw Kenma and Bokuto in each others arms, waiting for me to come out.

I haven't seen them since court day 2 years ago, it seems they are getting along just fine.

"HINATA, HINATA, HINATA!" Bokuto screams when he sees me, jumping around me, Kenma just gives me a wave as he runs into my arms.

"Why aren't you speaking Shoyo?" I hear Kenma ask, his voice obviously giving away that he was happy to see me

I write on my notepad 'I've become a selective mute, I couldn't stand my own voice and couldn't forgive myself so I decided it would be best for me to just shut up, it's been 1 and a half years since I decided that' and they collectively gasp.

'Anyways, hows your relationship going' I 'ask' with a wink, they both blush and I don't pay attention when they talk about how well they're going, I can't stand it.

I slap my leg to get their attention while I write 'I hope you two last' I say while walking away.

I feel jealous.

As I hear my music blast in my ears as I head to the home I have barely left in the past two years, only to go to the police or the psychiatrist.

'I had a dream last night, you cams back to me after our goodbye, my arms, you fell into and you asked if I'd run away with you'

I think of all those I've hurt, and those I've lost in the past two and a half year, if I never hurt Kageyama, if I never killed Akaashi or Oikawa, where would I be.

Well it's time to start university, in person, as a mute.

Oh and let's not forget everyone knowing I'm a killer.

This is going to be fun.

Chapter end  
Sorry if my writing is rushed, oh also, hinatas now selectively mute because he couldn't stand how he could talk but Akashi or oikawa couldn't.  
He's also jealous because Kenma and Bokuto are exclusive, so that poly isn't happening (maybe).  
University, this will be super fun to write, I h o p e.


	17. Judgement day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evil evil crows  
> IwaHina but platonic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise I don’t hate Sugawara or Daichi

Hinata's POV

I've been dreading the day that I have to return to public, to a university filled with people that I don't know.

I knew whatever University I go to people will know what I've done regardless, so I just applied for like 5 and got accepted in 1.

I don't even know the name of the place I just drove, following the directions on the paper they sent me.

Going from 'Homeschool' with no one but a police bodyguard to keep you company into a university with a couple thousand people is a fucking change.

As I'm walking through the large entrance, almost immediately I notice two familiar figures. Grey and Brown hair. Koushi Sugawara and Daichi Sawamura turn their heads and notice me.

Suga gives me a sideways glance and whispers in Daichi's ear, Daichi nods before both of them walk away.

That was probably the best possible outcome, but it still hurt to see two people that I used to know walk away at the sight of me.

After I pick up my schedule from the office ladies I notice that all eyes are on me, like a targets on my back. Obviously all I can do is ignore the stares so I just head to my lectures, barely paying attention to what the professor is teaching as he is just reading off the textbook.

After the first two classes I've settled from what happened in the morning, well I was settles, until I saw my worst nightmare in front of me.

Iwaizumi Hajime was walking in my direction.

I felt my whole body freeze, I haven't seen him since god knows when, and even though I never admitted to killing Oikawa, something in the way he is walking to me tells me that he has his suspicions.

I want to run away, I want to hide from the world, but I can't move, my legs feel stuck, paralysed.

Iwaizumi stops in front of me, looking me up and down before he starts speaking.

"So, Sugawara didn't lie when he said a roach moved to our university, murderers don't belong in public, especially when they got AWAY with two" I feel a fist come in contact with my face, I didn't even try to stop him because I knew I deserved this.

All I can mutter is 'I'm sorry' "So you don't speak anymore, good, freaks shouldn't speak"

Before he walks away from me, as I lay on the ground in a pool of blood I mutter something.

"Iwa, do your worst, I deserve it" I let it out in a whisper, but he heard it, and before I know it he's back at me, I flinch expecting to be hit again.

Instead I hear sobs come from him, he cries into my shoulder and I hug him with my short arms, I hear strings of 'I'm sorry' and 'I forgive you' come from Iwa as he relaxes on my shoulder.

Once his crying stops he backs away, and sees the condition I'm in, he didn't even notice how far he went.

"H-Hina, p-please I'm s-sorry I j-just m-miss o-oikawa and I had t-to take it out on you, let me take care o-of you" after he finishes he picks me up and takes me back to his apartment.

It's empty apart from about 10 photos of him and Oikawa and one photo of us three, it was after a practice.

I start writing on my notepad as he wraps up my arms 'Iwa, I'm so sorry that I took him from you, you don't have to forgive me, I don't deserve it' and he just nods signalling a no.

"Hinata, even though I know what you did I know that you've changed, you've had 2 years to think about what you've done, and besides, you are one of the people who got to know the real Oikawa, the one underneath the grin, so I forgive you, you don't deserve anything else to go wrong in your life, just let me back in" and as he finishes speaking I feel tears well up in my eyes, I just nod and hug him, stopping him from wrapping up my arms for a short second.

I start writing again 'Iwa, do you play volleyball for the University or did you stop after 3rd year' I see sadness hit his face after reading the last part.

"Hinata, to be truthful I played volleyball for my first year of university, but with out Oikawa, Makki, Mattsun or even you it never felt the same, what have you been up to these 2 years?" 

'Iwa I feel so bad, I even took volleyball from you. Anyways I've been living at home for 2 years, just me and a policeman doing online school. I haven't played volleyball since the end of first year' and he just frowns.

"Can we practice sometime?, just to get our mind off things, it can be our way of bonding" I nod, I feel like I owe everything to Iwaizumi so I agree straight away.

I feel at peace now.

The (past) Karasuno vbc group chat 😌

Suga  
Guys, guess who just moved to my uni

Noya  
THE

Tanaka  
MUFFIN

Noya  
MAN

Ennoshita  
Um, who Suga. Why is this even urgent

Yamaguchi   
^ Literally, Suga, you haven't messaged us in 1 year, why would we care.

Daichi  
I know who I'm just waiting for Suga to tell you

Tanaka  
Lol, he hasn't messaged you In 1 year Yama, try 2 years for me and Noya.

Suga  
Ok, well, anyways  
Hinata.  
Hinata moved to our uni  
Going back to ignoring ur asses.

Suga and Daichi left the chat.

Noya  
Wow, he's changes so much from his sugamama days.

Tanaka  
IKR what a bitch  
Anyways, HINATA. OMG. KOUHAI. IMISSEDYOU.

Yamaguchi  
Tanaka, he's not in the chat.

Tanaka  
Oh :(

Ennoshita   
It's been about 3 years since he left karasuno.  
And 2 years since we saw him, when we played Aobajohsai.  
He must have been so lonely, I can't believe he did what he did but I hope he changed.

Asahi  
Omg this chat, I thought this died a year ago when Suga and Daichi cut us all off.

Noya  
Babe, scroll up, read the room.

Asahi  
Omg, Suga is such a bitch lol  
Anyways, WE NEED TO FIND HINATA.  
I miss him and I forgive him, I know he didn't mean any of it

Yamaguchi   
How do you know that?

Asahi  
Before Hinata was put into his house for 2 years, he did one last interview with the press.   
There were heaps of scars on his arms, he was cutting because he felt guilty   
You could barely understand him in the interview because he was apologising to everyone while crying.  
You could see glimpses of the old hinata.  
I want him to be back with us. Who's in?

Yamaguchi  
Okay, defo convinced now, IM IN

Tanaka  
I would have been in anyways

Ennoshita   
Same with me 

Yachi   
Me too.

Kiyoko   
Absolutleyyyyyy

Noya  
Yacchan, Kiyoko, you're still here, YES.  
n e ways, IM SO IN.  
ALSO ASAHI, Dw I still love you 😘, just Kiyoko 😍😘😍❤️💝❤️😘😘😍❤️😍😘😍😘😍😘😍😍😘😍😘😍😍😘  
Operation bring our sunshine back to us COMMENZE

Yamaguchi   
*commence

Chapter end  
Remember to vote and comment  
I fell of the bed writing this chapter so please vote 😂


	18. Hinata Tracking Squad Activate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title says it all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2nd update today. Bam

Omg, what's this, a, filler, chapter, with, no, angst, finally.  
Nishinoya's POV

It's been three days since we all decided that we would bring our sunshine back, and today is the first day we start looking.

Obviously Asahi and I are already together, so that means we have to wait for the others, they better hurry up or we will leave without them.

After Aobajohsai beat us in the first match of Daichi, Suga and Asahi's first year, they went into a depression, they realised that they would never be able to play with us again so they all ended up not speaking to any of us for the rest of the year.

During Tanaka, Ennoshita and my third year I saw Asahi running around the block, he hadn't went to university that year so he was just staying home.

When he saw me he just ran, away from me, again. But I caught up to him and we made up.

Now we're together, so some things do work out I guess.

Anyways, back to Suga and Daichi. After they heard the news of Hinata, they just disappeared, if they were avoiding us before, at this point we didn't even exist to them.

Yachi found Kiyoko, Tanaka found Ennoshita, I found Asahi and Yamaguchi found Terushima.

It felt like all of us always lacked something after Hinata left, and that was the sun, everyone needs vitamin d, and Asahi's vitamin d wasn't enough.

Hehehehehehehe I'm so funny.

Oh wait this is serious, Hinata was the glue that held us together, without him we were not the same people.

That's why we need to find you Hinata.

Tanaka's POV

I have the pleasure of picking up everyone because Ennoshita and I kind of maybe sort of spent most of our University fund on a minibus.

BUT THATS NOT WHAT WERE FOCUSING ON

Yamaguchi stayed at my apartment (with Terushima) so we just have to pick up Yachi and Kiyoko, who excuse my French, but LIVE IN A FUCKING MANSION

I text Kiyoko that we're out the front gate and I see both of them walking out, hand in hand.

I'm so happy Kiyoko is happy.

Anyways we arrive at Noya and Asahi's house and as soon as we knock on the door we get dragged in. Noya is so cool and strong ugh.

"So guys, we know where Suga and Daichi go for university, we just need to ask around for Hinata. We will split up in couples. You guys understand"

"Yes" the whole group collectively agreed. Noya and Asahi were asking the professors if they knew anything about his location. Yachi and Kiyoko went to get massages because they said 'Hinata might be there'. Yamaguchi and Terushima looked around the campus and finally Ennoshita and I were going to the police station to see if they could give us any information on how he has gone,

Well aren't we just a fucking search party.

I've ALWAYS wanted to play detective.

Let's find our sunshine.

Third person POV

Up to this point most of their searches were dry. The professors kept professional and didn't give in to Noya's whining or Asahi's intimidating face. Unlike how they suspected, Yachi and Kiyoko did not see Hinata on their trip to the spa. Terushima and Yamaguchi never saw any orange hair, so gave up and went on a date instead and for Ennoshita and Tanaka the police stayed confidential, not discussing anything about Hinatas wellbeing or where he is.

That was until they all rejoined eachother in a cafe and saw a tuft of orange hair walk through the door.

"HINATA!" All 8 of them shouted

Hinata's POV

Today was a boring day, apart from seeing Iwaizumi in the morning all I did was sit in my double psychology lecture.

Also talking about psychology I have to go to the psychiatrist today. This one has been the most permanent. I pushed all of the others away but this one seemed different, she always seemed up for a conversation.

Today, aside from talking about my obvious struggles and also Iwaizumi, we had a 30 minute conversation about what country we would like to live in if we weren't Japanese.

It seemed like we collectively agreed Australia would be the best option until she searched on her phone about how the Australian Asian population gets treated there.

After that we both agreed that we should just stay in Japan.

After my appointment I always go to the cafè next to the office. As soon as I walk in I see 8 familiar faces and hear my name being shouted.

Nishinoya, Asahi, Yamaguchi and a random blonde that I think we played volleyball against, Tanaka, Ennoshita, Yachi and Kiyoko.

This is overwhelming.

I kind of like it.

Chapter end  
See guys I can write a chapter without angst   
Vote, comment, kudos, like, love.  
Woo! Love you guys sm


	19. Marathons with old friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They watch drag race. Suga is a bitch over Instagram comments. Happy happy happy happy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I changed the title from hinatas horrible harem because hinata, well, kills people, so feelings are fatal felt fitting  
> I just love you guys so much tbh, nothing else.

So we have a new title, Stan that.

Hinatas POV

"HINATA!" I hear them all scream as Noya jumps into my arms, causing me to fall over.

"Hinata" I hear Ennoshita clear his throat before continuing "where have you been all day, we have all been looking for you" as I feel Noya, who is still in my arms, look up to me, I know I won't get out of this situation without explaining it all.

"Guys, were in a public place, can we go somewhere else, it's a really long story" as I see them all nod, I feel Noya drag me to a car. Surprised I actually let myself speak, I consciously decide it would be better to speak with my friends. Oh and Terushima is here too I guess.

No, not just a car. A FUCKING MINIBUS. Who on gods green eart-

"Before you ask, It was Tanaka and Ennoshita's idea to buy a minibus" I hear Kiyoko's cool voice speak. 

"Something is telling me that it was Tanakas and he made Ennoshita do it" I say as I all hear a collective gasp before everyone breaks out laughing.

Tanaka hangs his head down in shame but Ennoshita laughs, I guess that's all the answers I need from that conversation.

The conversations we all had on the way back to Tanaka and Ennoshita's house were all over the place, I realise how much I missed talking to my senpais.

"Hinata, I know you're not ready to explain everything in the car, but can you explain what happened the last two times we saw you" I hear Yamaguchi ask, I just nod.

"Okay, so when Kageyama confessed to me, which was the same day he killed him self because I rejected him, let's just say very very very ducking harshly. I realised the next person I should go for is Tsukki, because at that point he was still 'bullying' me, but I caught feelings for him. Oh also I was the random number that sent the message of Tsukki that made you all hate him." I give them time to soak it all up and react, but everything is silent apart from the radio playing lightly in the background.

"So when you guys attacked Tsukki, I realised how much I actually liked him so I came from going to the train station to save him from becoming broken like me" as I finish that bit I hear gasps.

"Hinata, were you the reason Kageyama killed himself, if you were I promise it wasn't your faul-"

"Yes it was, I didn't just reject him, I assaulted him and called him terrible things. I was the reason he died" I feel my two senpais, Noya and Tanaka hug me. That's not how it was supposed to go.

"We forgive you Hinata. Finally for our car conversations, why did you ignore us when you beat us playing for Aobajohsai?" I hear Ennoshita ask, I glance all around the car, seeing Terushima and Yamaguchi cuddling, Terushima seems to be uncomfortable in this situation, I feel bad for dragging him into this.

"I just felt too guilty to talk to any of you, obviously you guys have heard of my...... court hearing, so I had that on my mind, I didn't want to drag any of you into the mess that is Hinata, please, you guys should just get away from me before I- before I do something" I just see them with sad looks on their face, no pity, just sadness.

"Hinata we all forgive you, what about instead of dwelling on this subject we marathon a season of RuPauls drag race and stay up all night eating popcorn and gossiping" I hear Yachi speak, I hear everyone agree as they all turned their heads to me, even Tanaka who was driving and barely had any input on the conversation.

"I- I've never watched that show" I hear them all gasp in mock offence.

"Oh Hinata, baby, sis, ma'am, you have a lot to learn. Mama Yachi will teach it all to you so don't you worry your little pretty head about it" I hear Yachi say wait a grin on her face. I. Am. Scared.

Time skip, they're at the EnnoTana household  
Hinatas POV

As Kiyoko was making the popcorn and Asahi prepared the drinks, Yachi gave me a quick run down on the fundamentals of rupauls drag race.

She said we were going to start at season 5 and go through other seasons out of order. I also asked her who should we like but she said that was up to me. Yachi is so nice not to pressure me into liking someone.

As we start watching the first episode the others are chatting as they have watched it before, but I payed full attention to all of the queens.

Tonight was the best night I've had in two years, no dramas, just me and some friends catching up.

Halfway through the night Terushima and I had a long conversation on what shape would win in a fight. We quickly decided that we Should be friends shortly after.

When the season eventually finished, revealing the winner as my personal favourite Jinkx monsoon, we just ended up taking throughout the rest of the night, then we passed out at 8am. 

I was woken by the banging of pots, I looked up to see Tanaka and Noya grinning down at me as Asahi and Ennoshita looked at me with apologetic looks whole Yachi and Kiyoko were in the corner laughing.

"Ennoshita, why are our bottoms so problematic" I hear Asahi say, loud enough that all of us could hear.

Before I know it, Tanaka and Noya are as red as tomatos, their faces lit up as they wilted like flowers. Yachi, Kiyoko, Terushima, Yamaguchi and I were howling as Asahi and Ennoshita were laughing, trying to get away from Tanaka and Noya as they were chasing them around with pots.

“This was amazing, we have to keep in touch now, right Hinata.” And I nod, all of us now group hugging as Tanaka took out his phone and took a selfie.

I get an notification for Instagram. As I walk out of the house, catching the bus and getting back home.

@tanananana posted a photo you are tagged in  
Me and my gays 😍 200 likes-33 comments  
@sugamamakoshi - ew  
Replies to this comment  
@tanananana - just fucking leave bitch  
@yamacoochie - were hotter than you bitch  
@key-yo-koh - I’m embarrassed to have know you Suga  
Next comment.  
@hinatashoyosunshine - I luv you guys, thank you for forgiving me  
Replies to this comment  
@lesbianism - everyone liked that  
@terushimelater - circles still win in a fight hinata  
@noyayayaya - we love you KOUHAI.

Chapter end  
Suga said villain and we stan.  
Stan drag race, rest in power chi chi  
Vote, comment, share, like  
Woo!


	20. I miss that feeling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> LOL THIRD YEAR VILLAINS APART FROM KIYOKO SQUAD ACTIVATED REAL QUICK

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol wasn’t hinata meant to be the villain, Chile.  
> Maybe we get Tsukkishima soon, who knows, not me I make the entire storyline up as I am writing. I’m guessing you can tell that this book has no planning it’s just me testing out my creativity.  
> Thank you for the continuous support it means so much.

Hinata's POV

The next 2 months went on pretty normally, I went to university on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, I practiced volleyball with Iwaizumi on sundays and after I had my psychiatrist appointment on Tuesday's I hung out with what we have all named 'the gays tm'.

Fair to say I was the happiest I have ever been, I had people around me to support me. I had (some form) of volleyball back in my life and everyone seemed to be happy.

Key word, seemed.

On the 3rd of April, 2020. I got a call, it was the usual Skype call 'the gays tm' had and when I saw it pop up on my screen I smiled.

"Hi gays, how are we doing on this fine Saturday" I hear Noya greet "I hate to be the bitch that brings the mood down but" I hear his voice tremble as the looks into the camera with sad eyes. "Um, I don't think I can tell you over call, is thee any chance you could come visit Asahi and I".

Everyone said yes, shocked because we weren't used to seeing Noya sad at all.

I caught public transport to their house, not trusting myself to drive with a head full of thoughts. I just try not to dwell on anything as I hear the song 'how to lose a friend' by WAFIA blast in my ears. Listening to a sad song in what I assume to be a sad situation isn't helping at all and as I step off the bus, walking to the familiar house, I see that Yachi and Kiyoko are already inside.

As I walk through the door the aura is completely off, it feels like people have been crying. As Noya notices my presence he just runs up to me and hugs me. I decide it won't be appropriate to ask any questions until he is ready. But I do notice Asahi's absence immediately..... weird.

As the others (Tanaka, Ennoshita, Terushima and Yamaguchi) arrive together and sit on the couch next to me, I hear Tanaka do exactly what I didn't want to do.

"Noya, where is Asahi" as he notices everyone but Noya give him stink eye, he just gasps in surprise. Realising something happened between Noya and Asahi.

"Guys, A-asahi c-cheated on me and t-then dumped me after I caught him" I hear Noya cry and I run straight to his side, rubbing his back.

"I don't mean to sound ignorant or rude, but who was it with Senpai?" I see his sad face look up at me, in his eyes I can tell that he knew the person who he cheated on him with.

"H-hinata, can y-you wait f-for t-that ans-answer, I d-don't think I-I'mready to share. I just want to get out of this house a-as soon a-as possible" as I feel everyone walk to where Noya is, giving him a group hug, you could really feel the absence of Asahi in our group.

Before I know it I'm the first one to speak up "Noya, live with me. I live close to everyone's house and I have a spare room for you" and before I know it he jumps into my arms, knocking me over.

"R-really, is that ok with you guys?" Noya stutters out.

Everyone says their approval and we all kiss Noya on his head.

"Tanaka, can you drive Noya and I back to my place, Noya already packed his stuff" I ask Tanaka.

"Of course Hinata, this is such a genuine thing you are doing. You are an amazing friend" and as I feel the bald shark toothed man hug me I feel tears well up in my eyes. "T-thank you Tanaka-Senpai" I say that last bit with the intention to tease, he just goes bright red and goes to comfort Noya.

Before I know it all of our phones ding at the same time. Notifying something was said in our group chat.

Asahi  
Never liked you anyway Yuu.  
Go to hell you slut ❤️

Asahi left 😘the😍gays😜

Silence went around the room. Everyone was shocked at the harsh words that Asahi, the literal human embodiment of Jesus Christ just said.

Seems fishy.

"Yamaguchi, Hinata, we have now officially lost our third years. Noya don't worry, we will kill him for you. If you ever need anything from us just ask. We have all the time in the world for you Yuu" I hear Yachi speak as I see Kiyokos face, I see tears fall down but she is trying to act strong for us.

"Kiyoko, can we talk please, you look like you have a lot on your mind" I ask and she just nods. As soon as we step into the next room she falls on my shoulder and starts to sob.

"Hinata, don't you ever think I will leave you guys like those asshole third years. I love you guys too much to do that" and while I rub her back she continues "I just want to cry so much, two of my best friends in Suga and Asahi just ditched me, I'm being selfish I know, but I will never forgive them, I will never forgive Suga for treating you like shit after you returned but I will NEVER. AND I MEAN NEVER. Forgive a cheater" and I just silently agree with her, not wanting to interrupt her as this is her time to rant.

"You know what else Hinata. He slut shamed Nishinoya Yuu. Nishinoya Yuu has literally never had lustful eyes for anyone but Asahi. No one deserves what our Noya is going through you know. Asahi, Suga and I have been friends since childhood. But I will never forgive them. Never ever ever ever EVER. Hinata, I just want to finish by saying. I know you have done fucked up things, severe laps in judgements that have put you in costly situations. But you are an amazing friend and the support you are not only giving Noya, but even to me right now is amazing, so thank you for this"

"Of course Kiyoko, I feel like I owe so much to you guys for making me happy that I will always be here to help" and after we release from a hug we walk back into the main room.

Noya has 6 suitcases at his side and Ennoshita and Tanaka are holding 3 each. It seems it's time to leave Asahi and this house in the past.

Bye bitch.

Chapter end  
Omg a whole chapter in one POV, i didn't even know I could do that.  
Also chapter 20 omfg, idk how many chapters this will have as I'm kinda improvising the whole thing but who cares   
Anywaysssss. Vote, kudos, comment, share, like   
Woo!


	21. How to lose a friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We learn who asahi cheated with.  
> Noya realises friends are more important than love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is one of the messiest things I’ve ever written.  
> So it’s pretty iconic  
> Anyways follow me on  
> Instagram - @william.marinn  
> Wattpad - @kodzukenstan

Nishinoya's POV 

Moving in with Hinata was the best thing to ever happen to me, he always checked up on me, made me soup and he even sung me to sleep some days.

He should run a 'getting over a breakup' service because this bitch knows how to treat a boy right.

Ever since Hinata came back everything felt warmer, everyone seemed so much happier and honest.

Well everyone but Asahi.

In the days after we marathoned Drag Race, everything seemed so much lighter, we talked everyday and Asahi was treating me like I was the only person in the world worth his time.

Until he stopped. On the 22nd of March I went to hug him but he pushed away. The next day when we went to hang out with the group he talked to everyone but me.

Then that fateful day came. The 2nd of April I was coming home after university and as soon as I arrived I noticed something wasn't right, there was 2 cars in the driveway. Asahi's and a red car that looked quite familiar.

My idiotic self decided that there was going to be nothing wrong so I should just go inside and greet my boyfriend.

When I walked in I heard moaning, it wasn't Asahi's so I played it off as a movie that he was watching. I tried to make every excuse in the world for what was happening but deep down I think I knew.

I walked to our door where the moaning was quite loud. The I heard Asahi speak in that sex voice I was so familiar with.

"Iwaizumi, quiet down, the slut will be home and I want to fuck your tight asshole to get a real release" and as soon as I heard that I broke down in tears. Wallowing in an ocean of tears before I let out a loud sob.

I suddenly heard the familiar rocking of the bed stop and heard Asahi curse on the other side of the door.

I heard the door creek open as I saw his familiar face and body look down at me.

From there it seemed to be blurry, but I remember him asking "How much did you hear" and when I told him that I heard "Just enough" he started screaming at me.

He used his height and general bulk to swing his arm at me, I'm guessing he was trying to intimidate me, well it fucking worked.

"I'm leaving you Noya, I never liked you and your ugly pig like body and horse face. I'm leaving with my love and I'll give you 2 days to pack up and get out of my house. I hope you kill yourself" and after he finished. He went back in our- no his room to get changed. When they walked put of the door I saw Iwaizumi look down at me with pity.

I don't want pity, I just want my Asahi back.

Hinata's POV 

As I see Noya sitting on the couch, looking as deep in thought I decide it's probably about time I go and visit Iwaizumi. I haven't talked to him since Noya moved in.

"Noya, I'm going out to a friends place. I'll keep you updated on what time I'll come back, will you be alright alone or should I text Kiyoko, you know what I know you will say that you're fine but you're not so I'm going to text Kiyoko anyways"

"Ok Hinata, have fun." He says blankly. No expression showing on his face.

To Kiyoko  
Can you look after Noya, I'm going to catch up with a friend.

From Kiyoko  
Of course hinata. I'm bringing Yachi and snacks so if you come back early you can join us.

To Kiyoko  
Sounds amazing, thank you ☺️.

Good, now that I know that Noya will be safe I can see Iwaizumi. I hope he's doing alright, the last time I talked to him he said he got a boyfriend but he wouldn't tell me who it was yet.

As I'm driving to Iwaizumi's house I plug in my AUX chord, and put on one of my favourite artists, Allie X, on shuffle. As I am driving the song Hello comes on and I start screaming it. I can feel that today is going to me amazing.

As I arrive at Iwaizumi's apartment I greet the lady at the front and go to the elevator because fuck taking the stairs.

As I walk down the hallway I see the familiar number of 8b, I knock on the door. Only to be greeted by a shirtless red faced Iwaizumi.

"Uh, Hinata, my boyfriend is here right now, did you need something?" I hear him ask, I just give him a smirk knowing what he was about to do with whoever this boy is.

"Ooh, Iwa, what were you about to do, some Netflix and chill" I say and wink at him. As he is about to open his mouth to protest I hear another. Very familiar Voice add in"

"Babe, who is it, we were just about t- oh fuck" I look behind Iwaizumi to see Asahi.

Don't tell me Iwaizumi was the person Asahi cheated with. Please don't tell me that.

"Oh, Asahi. How lovely. Last time I heard from you, you called my best friend a slut, obviously someone needs to look at themselves before they speak" and as I finish I look at Iwaizumi who looks guilty. 

"Hinata I-" both of them start before I cut them both off, piecing everything together in my head.

"So, Noya, who is one of the sweetest most caring people in the fucking world. Walked in on you two fucking, then you decide to call Noya a slut even though you were the one that cheated on him. Is that right Azumane. Oh and Hajime, DONT think I forgot about you. You walked out of the house with Asahi, right. How can you be so heartless to walk past a boy who was cheated on and proceed to stay with the cheater. You two deserve nothing. Hajime, never speak to me again, fuck your precious memories, you don't deserve my friendship. And You you fucking mongrel boar looking ass pig. I never want to see you again. Now I must bid you two terrible pigs Adeiu. Continue being the worst people I know."

As I walk out of the apartment. Breaking the door by slamming it so hard. I feel tears run down my face. 

I call Noya when I drive. I don't know what else I can do at this point so I put my phone on hands free mode.

"Noya. I'm coming home early. I need to have a serious talk to you. Love you, bye"

I couldn't bare to hear his response. I don't want to ruin his fun with Kiyoko and Yachi but I can't keep what I just saw to myself.

Before I know it I'm home. Opening the door.

"Noya, I know who asahi cheated on you with." 

Nishinoya's POV

I don't need Hinata to repeat what he said to me, I am just dumbfounded.

"W-what do you mean" and he just sighs.

"I am- used to be friends with Iwaizumi, he was the friend I was seeing today. And when he answered the door him and Asahi were both shirtless. I kind of flipped out at both of them. Obviously for good reason. Anyways Noya, please know that you don't have to hide anything from me" 

As Hinata finishes I start crying. Forgetting the other two people in the room I jump into Hinatas arms and just sob. I feel his hand go down to my back as he comforts me and after Hinata releases me from the hug I feel Kiyoko and Yachi give me a double hug and a kiss on the forehead, they whispered comforting things in my ears as I cried into their shoulders.

I don't need Asahi anymore. I have my best friends with me.

Iwaizumi's POV

After Hinata leaves I feel tears run down my face. The only person that truly understood me just left me. And for good reason too, it hits me like a tonne of bricks, the fact that I'll never be able to talk to someone with the same memories of Oikawa ever again. And even though he killed Oikawa. I knew deep down Oikawa would have forgiven him. So of course I forgave him.

The difference from his mistake and mine is that he changed, he became an amazing friend, a friend that took on the role of taking care of his best friend who was cheated on. And it was my fault. Hinata was a good enough friend that he visited me every week and checked up on me every day. 

"You didn't need him anyway" I hear Asahi say. This statement makes me angry. Angrier than I've ever been before.

"Asahi, you have to understand that Hinata, Oikawa and I shared so many memories with each other, he was the only person that understood that side of me. This is my fault not yours" I see him grin at this statement.

"Anyways, you up for round 2 babe, you were pretty eager before hinata got here" he says with a wink as he dismisses what I said and I just nod. Scared of what he would do if I said no.

Chapter end  
Wow, asahi is totally the worst.  
Also, he kinda just raped our boy Iwa, if you didn't notice Iwa saying 'scared of what he would do if I said no'  
Remember guys, consent is the most important thing in the world. Ask 2 times, 3 times, 20 times, never force yourself to do something that you don't want to do.  
Anywaysssss. Vote, kudos, comment, share, like  
Woo!


	22. Flesh without blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evil hinata has an evil plan

Hinata's POV

Breaking Asahi. Step 1

After seeing Noya cry, smile, laugh and rant to me. I realise something very important.

My feelings for him were not just those of brotherly love. I was in love with him.

Of course I am not going to confess to him, for two reasons in particular.

Number 1 is that he just got cheated on by Ass-ahi so he probably has some major trust issues with relationships. Which is fair enough, if I went through what he has went through in the past couple of weeks or so, I don't think I would have been strong enough to come out alive. His strength amazes me, mentally and physically.

The second reason is that I don't want to risk my friendship with him, maybe he will see my confession as me taking advantage of his vulnerable state. Which is the last thing I want him to assume. So I decide to do the next best thing, something potentially dangerous for me.

Stringing Asahi and Iwaizumi along. I will avenge Noya's feeling by making those who made him suffer feel even worse than he ever has.

Step 1. Tell Noya about this, I'm not doing this without his own permission, I'm not that bad of a friend, and maybe he will enjoy it in the end.

As I walk out of my lair- sorry, bedroom and into the living room, I see Noya sleeping on the couch with ice-cream on the corners of his lips. The tv was still playing a Korean drama, really Noya? Why am I not surprised.

"NOYA WAKE UP, KIYOKO DUMPED YACHI" I see him rush himself awake and run to me.

"W-what. Oh you just used that as a wake up call again, I would never let my favourite couple split up, you only say that when you have something important to say so what is it?" He says that entire sentence in a lovely space of 5 seconds, if I didn't know him better I wouldn't have understood it.

Lucky that I know him the best.

"Oh wow, you got me. Anyways I need to ask you something" I see him usher me on with his hands "Would you like to see me break Asahi, now before you question my tactics I won't hurt him physically. I just can't forgive him for what he did to you. If you don't want me to do it then I won-"

"Do it. He deserves it. Also don't go easy on him, he did hit me, cheat on me then dump me after. Do as you please, just don't get yourself into legal trouble" as he finishes my grin grows as I hug him.

"I won't let you down Noya, I'll make him feel the worst he has ever felt. And in the end he will be begging for your forgiveness" as I finish he tells me that he is going to go back to sleep, perfect.

Step 1 has been completed.

Breaking Asahi. Step 2

Step two would be much more complicated than the first. Mostly because it requires more than just a simple question asked to a friend.

The rest of my plan is leaning on how well I execute this step.

I like to call this step. 'I forgive you, you were right Asahi'. Basically I head to Iwaizumi's apartment, and I will use his previous trust against him to tell me everything about Him and Asahi's relationship. Then I will meet up with Asahi and manipulate his feelings to make him feel superior. Betraying Iwaizumi doesn't matter to me as Noya's happiness is my biggest priority. If a few hearts get broken on the way to the crown, I don't care.

I arrive at the familiar apartment building and go to the familiar floor. Standing outside Iwaizumi's apartment made me think over what I was about to do.

Before I come to a conscious decision by body's reflexes knock on the door. The door opens almost immediately as I feel a large figure jump onto my chest.

"H-hinata, is that really you, I missed you. Please never leave me again. Asahi, h-he raped me right after you left." I just 'comfort' him. I just don't care for him, I will never be able to look at him the same way.

"Hajime, I need to talk to you about Asahi. If you don't answer truthfully I will slap the answers out of you. Did I mention I have been told I have a killer slap before. You don't want to test me" Oh wow, I didn't expect to say that, it just felt like my mouth moved for me. I promised Noya that I wouldn't hurt anyone physically but he did say 'don't get into any legal trouble' so what's a little white lie going to do.

"O-of course H-hinata. Anything to gain you back into my life" he says like a pathetic little puppy. About to be kicked out of the house.

As he lets me home I notice the house is a wreck. The scent of sex was strong in the air as there was 5 or 6 used condoms around the house.

Before I start asking questions I turn my phones voice memos on, making sure I have these answers documented to track any lies.

"Question 1. When did you two start getting together?"  
"1 and a half years ag0"  
"Question 2. Did you feel sorry for when you saw him in the hallway, beaten you by Asahi, crying in the corner because the love of his life just cheated on him?"  
"A-at the time, no I didn't, it was incredibly selfish of me"  
"Question 3. How did this relationship start?"  
"I was looking for sex at the gay club and saw Asahi, I remembered him from when we played Karasuno and thought he was hot. As soon as we talked he told ,e that he was in a relationship that he hated. He said he was only dating Nishinoya for money. This made me think I had a chance. Ever since then we hooked up every time Nishinoya was out the house"  
"Slut" I mutter, barely a whisper but I see Iwaizumi flinch at the harsh word.

"And finally question 4" I take a gasp. Already knowing what his reaction was going to be after I asked him.

"Hajime. What would Oikawa think of you. Sleeping around with a taken man. Definitely not proud I can say." As I see tears well up in his eyes I know it's time to stop recording, definitely time to leave aswell.

As he notices me walk towards the door he lunges at me, tears covering his whole face "HINATA, PLEASE DONT LEAVE ME, ILL CHANGE, I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU. ILL APOLOGISE TO NOYA, BRING ME WITH YOU" as he notices I'm not listening to him directly he sobs louder, no, he wails.

"H-H-Hinata, P-p-please d-don't g-go. I d-don't want h-him to r-r-r-rape me" and this broke the sympathy chord. As someone with past sexual assault experience I felt exactly what he felt in this moment. Fear that his only hope was going to leave him.

"Iwaizumi. Don't break that promise. I'm taking you to my home and you are going to explain everything to Noya. And I mean everything, anything Noya asks, you answer." I say sternly and he opens and closes his mouth like a fish.

"And while you do that. I am going to have a nice chat to Asahi. Cheating. Raping. He deserves something nice and terrible to happen to him"

The drive home with Iwaizumi was silent, seeing his large muscular body look so broken was terrifyingly confronting to me. He acted like he was begging for his life. I just hope I made the right decision.

"Iwa, here's the key. Walk in. Talk to Noya. I'll be back sometime. Food is in the fridge. Sleep in my bed." As I walk away I see him nod.

No more extra steps to my plan. I'm going head first to Asahi, and his mole looking ass won't enjoy it. Not at all.

Nishinoya's POV

Staying at home is boring, especially without Hinata.

Oh great, I hear the car go up the driveway and I hear the key being entered in the lock. At least Hinata is home now. 

As the door opens, I see I head peek through.

"N-Nishinoya"

"You!"

Chapter end   
King of cliffhangers.  
Honestly this is making less and less sense every chapter, iconic.  
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	23. Forgivness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of forgiving, not much forgetting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DONT WORRY GUYS THEY DONT FORGIVE ASS-AHI  
> Literally who else but me would make the nicest, purest boy evil.

Nishinoya's POV

I see one of the two people I never wanted to see in my life.

Iwaizumi Hajime. The man Asahi cheated with. It felt like I saw red as soon as I heard his voice, I knew who it was immediately.

"I-I have to explain some stuff, please hear me out" I hear him say. I see that he has been crying, a lot it seems as his face is completely red and eyes puffy.

His usually spiky hair is completely down, not one spike facing north.

After examining his condition for a while my face softens. I look down to his trembling hands, which held Hinata's key.

"Can you explain everything, about Asahi. I'm guessing that wasn't your first hookup. I just need clarity.

"O-of course, I was looking for a hookup at a club and I saw asahi, he said she was in a relationship that he hated and said he was using you for money. We had sex for a year and a half until that day you caught us. Just a couple days ago h-he raped me. I never said no but I never agreed and he just started f-fucking me. Noya, I know we aren't close at all, but I have to give you my deepest, most sincerest apologies" as I see him head towards the door I lunge at him, enveloping his large frame in a hug, his face showed a shocked expression before he warmed to my touch.

"So Hinata helped you I guess. I know he came to your apartment with bad intentions but it seems what he is doing is creating more good than bad" and as Iwaizumi nods I feel sleep take over my eyes.

"K-keep hugging me Noya. Can we sleep?" I just sleepily nod as I feel sleep take over me. 

The final thing I remember hearing is what my mother said to me when she got cheated on by father.

'It's barely ever the person who he or she cheated with's fault. Always blame the cheater honey'

I smile into Iwaizumi's chest as I pull him close.

So cute.

Hinatas POV

So, on my way to Noya's old house I realise there is one important detouring have to take. 

Another person who I haven't seen in nearly 3 years. My still boyfriend even though I've dated many times.

Tsukishima Kei. My first love, I can't believe I haven't visited him once.

All I've heard is that his first two years in prison were terrible, people beat him up because he was so lanky. Not a muscular muscle on that boys body. And as a result of his beatings his mental health declined so much so drastically that he broke. So they had to move him to an mental hospital.

I've neglected this responsibility for too long. I feel insanely guilty for not even sending as much as a letter to comfort him. Especially because my feelings for him have never completely been lost. I promise I'm not a slut I just love multiple people okay.

It's...... complicated, I will always love Tsukishima, my first real love and the first person that accepted the real, slightly deluded me. Bokuto and Kenma are happy somewhere else, only messaging me when necessary. And Noya, he's just so vulnerable to me, he's been through so much and I just want to protect him from all the bad in the world.

The Mental Hospital visiting hours only allow visitors to see the paitients for 1 hour, so I have to make the most of this.

"Hello, I'm Yuko, who are you looking to visit today?" A nice faced, plump looking lady asks.

"T-tsukishima, Tsukishima Kei"and her face lights up at that. 

"Oh!, he always says he is going to have his boyfriend visit him, that must be you. He will be so exited, I don't like to play favourites but he is my favourite patient. His saltiness is almost funny. Which is the best we will get here. Anyways he's in room 22b, down two hallways then turn right" I just thank her politely before following her directions.

I knock on his door, weary of the time. It's 14:22, I have an hour.

"Who is it?, I swear if it's you Yuko, I promise I'm not lying about my boyfri-" as he opens the door his eyes widen and I see every emotion collect in his eyes. Happiness being the most prominent.

"HINATA HINATA HINATA HINAATAAAAAAAAAA! I knew I didn't imagine you, you came, you actually came. They won't tell me how long I've been here but I suspect it's been two weeks. That's so long away from you" I just flinch. They've......... really kept him out of touch with reality.

"Tsukki, I'm so sorry baby, I'm so sorry for not visiting you but you are very wrong about the date. I-it's been nearly 3 years, I have so much to tell you. But first I need to make up my time. I'm so sorry for not talking to you. I'm so sorry for letting you get beat up in prison and letting them break you. It's all my fault." And I feel his arms wrap around me. Damn I missed his hugs.

"T-three years, you have to tell me what's happened in that time, I'm just so happy you're here with me now, they tried to say I was crazy and that you weren't real. That I just imagined you. You are real, right?" I just lock my lips with his and nod into his mouth.

"So it all started when I moved to Fukurodani after you went to jail......."

I explained everything, not one single detail left our, and it ended up with me talking to him without interruptions for 33 minutes, his following every move of mine.

"Hinata, I'm so sorry" and as I am about to ask what for he continues "for not being there for you, if I didn't overreact, nearly kill Kuroo, none of this would have happened. Also good on you for falling in love with others too. I wouldn't want my boy to be lonely without me. That was my biggest fear. I also forgive you, for killing people, because who am I to judge, I nearly killed someone too. I'm proud that you and your lawyers lowered the case for you. I'm just so proud of you Hina, you've been through so much. Oh shit, visiting time is nearly up. Please just promise me one thing Hina. Promise that when I get out of here next year. You will pick me up and we will live together. If you are dating someone or not, I just want to be with you. Maybe we can be poly. Who cares, I just want you again."

As Tsukki finishes I just start crying tears of happiness, it feels like all the weight in the world was lifted off of my shoulders.

I'm coming Asahi. And you won't know what hit you.

Chapter end  
If asahi was Jesus then I would say be worried for him  
But that shithead has everything coming.  
As the great Kim Kardashian said 'it's what she deserves'  
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	24. I drove all night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Omg partyyyyy

Hinata's POV

After visiting Tsukki I felt refreshed. His forgiveness lit a fire underneath my ass, to be able to see him laugh, smile and well.... cry was exactly what I needed. You don't realise how much you miss someone until you see them I guess.

The chances of Asahi actually being home are quite low as he probably is intoxicated at the nearest gay bar, looking for his newest prey. He ducking disgusts me.

It's about I hurt someone that actually deserves it I guess. I'm scared at how far I really want to go, the hatred that I feel towards this man is immense, he raped my best friend, cheated on another of my best friends and also physically abused him after cheating.

As I arrived at the familiar house, what I once thought was a happy home filled with memories I notice an angry aura surround the block of land.

As I look through the window I see him on the couch, watching some shitty reality tv show. 'If it's not drag race it's not worth our time' is something that he said to us. Was everything a lie?

Before I break his door down I think of what really would be the most appropriate way to go through with this.

Then I remember something that has been forgotten for 2 years, gone unused. Mind reading, perfect.

He might have a hard exterior, but what is he really thinking in that pea sized brain.

I focus all of my attention to him through the front bushes, he's too busy watching The Bachelor to notice. Lame.

"Ugh, I hate these straight shows. I wish everyone was here and we could watch drag race. I miss them all, I don't know why I did those things. At least Iwaizumi liked me enough to let me fuck him" I stop listening in there as I remember that Asahi never got any consent from Iwa. So he thinks he did nothing wrong, no regret was found in his thoughts, he just sounded empty.

Cool. Well time to give him a surprise.

I see the large white door in front of me. Last time I visited this house was to pick Noya up.

Before I knock I take a swig of vodka. It will make sense later I promise.

I knock on the door and hear loud footsteps come from the other side, as he opens the door I put my acting mode on.

Get ready for the performance of a lifetime.

"Heyyyyyy, Asahiiiiiiii, djou wanna fucc" I see his face morph into a confused one, but I know that he is a man that follows instincts before he thinks.

"Shoyo, why are you here. Shouldn't you be with Y-Nishinoya" he says with a sad expression. I don't believe it for a second, let's see what he's thinking shall we.

"Wow, I hope he realises how sincere I am, I miss them all. But he wants to fuck, maybe if we fuck then we can become close again and I can apologise to noya." Oh Asahi, that's where you're wrong. Noya will never forgive you. And also why would you think your ex would forgive you for cheating on him if you fuck his best friend. Is this man really this deluded.

"I woulddddd Asahiiiiiii, buttttt I wanted to *hic* see youuu, you look *hic* so sexyyyy." And I see his face light up. And before I know it he is dragging me into the house and on to his bed.

I feel his lips smash against mine as I try not to gag, he flinched as he tastes the fresh taste of vodka in my saliva.

He starts grinding against me as I feel him starting to get hard. I would be getting hard if he was any good. But I'm overdoing it with the moaning anyways.

Before I know it he's forcing me on my knees. Putting his clothed member in front of me.

This Bitch thinks I'm going to suck him off, how cute.

Our eyes lock before I take control, surprising him with my strength as I pin him to the wall.

"Taking advantage of a drunk man. Asahi, I knew you were bad but this is terrible. But that's what the police are for hehe" as I let out a cheesy grin at him his face becomes overtaken with guilt as I slam him down on the floor. His head underneath my foot as I apply pressure to his head.

"I'm going to teach you a lesson, if you even try to move from under me I won't hesitate in killing you, Asahi~" and as I feel his large figure tremble underneath me I know I'm getting exactly what I want from tonight.

I'm going to break him. Worse than he broke Noya or Iwa. This will not be temporary, he will be shattered.

"So asahi~, if you could start by telling me everything you have done wrong, that would be LOVELY!" I say in a sickly sweet tone before snapping.

"W-when I was a kid I-"

"DONT YOU FUCKING DARE TELL ME YOUR ENTIRE LIFE STORY, I MEAN RECENTLY YOU OVERGROWN CAVEMAN!" I shout, this bitch is getting on my nerves.

I press my other foot on his neck, applying pressure to both areas before hearing his pleas.

"I-I cheated on N-noya, 26 times, with 12 seperate people. I-I hit Noya, I b-betrayed you guys' trust. I-is that it. Please don't hurt me Hinata you're better than this"

"YOU DONT KNOW ME YOU SLUT, CHEATING ON SUCH A LOYAL MAN. AMD YOU FUCKING FORGOT ONE IMPORTANT THING asahi~" I say while releasing him from my feet. He sits up and starts sobbing. Oh how sad.

He looks up at me, tears filled his eyes, he looks confused. I expected this.

"Asahi~ last time you had sex with Iwaizumi. Did he ever say that you could enter, or did you just assume" and he starts to wipe his tears as he gasps. Realising something.

"I-I assumed Hinata. D-does that mean I r-raped him, oh fuck. I became exactly what I hate. Hinata. Before I started sleeping with other men, Noya and I were so happy. Unbreakable. But then one day when we were doing 'it' I didn't feel satisfied. One trip to a club and I turned into a different person. Hinata, I'm back. I'm your Sen-"

"You. YOU. YOU!. YOU THINK I WOULD FORGIVE YOU AFTER EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE. YOU'VE HURT MANY PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT. I am not g-going to h-hurt you a-any more, but I am going to the police to tell them about the sexual and physical assault. Today and what happened with Noya and Iwa. See you at court. Asahi~" as I see him break down in tears I feel tears threaten to fall in my own.

He's begging, but I won't fall for begging twice in the same day. "H-hinata p-please I d-don't w-want to g-go t-to jail" I just swiftly turn and strut out of the door.

Time to finally get justice for Noya and Iwa.

Asahi's POV

I feel empty.

I deserved every second of that. I was so scared of Hinata when I was underneath him. After I tried to take advantage of him.

Everything he said was confronting but for me when he told me what I did to Iwaizumi I felt it all come to me.

It started as a sex problem and now I've sexually assaulted 2 people.

I'm proud of Hinata. He did what's right, even if it's at my cost. At least at the court I will be able to see Noya's face. Maybe I can finally give him a real apology.

It's the least he deserves.

And Iwaizumi, after hearing what I did seeing his face might just make me break out in tears. I can't forgive myself.

All of the gang will be there to celebrate me going to prison. Kiyoko, Tanaka, Ennoshita, Yachi, Hinata, Yamaguchi, Terushima.

They were all like siblings to me, Kiyoko and I were best friends since Kindergarten. After Suga and Daichi left the gang we were the only third years left.

Then I went out one night. The fatal night that turned me into a Cheater, rapist and an abuser.

I feel my phone ding several times.

Suga  
Here to remind you that I'm here for you. How are you and noya doing, I'm so sorry for ignoring you ❤️

I just block his contact and see the other two messages.

Hinata☀️  
Police coming to your house. Confess everything, you will be found out anyway. See you at court, Noya, Iwa and I will all testify against you. I wish the best for you in your future. Improve 💕

And the final message broke my heart, the one girl I didn't what to hear from.

My! Literal! Sister! (Kiyoko)  
I hope you get locked up for a long time. You lied, you said to me after Suga and Daichi left us that "you would never leave me" but it seems that you lie about everything, from loving someone to consent. I can't believe I not only trusted you. But I thought of you as my brother.

Never talk to me again. I'll see you at court  
\- Shimizu.

After seeing that message all of my will to win my case leaves me. I made my friends hate me and I deserve all of it.

I'm worthless. I hope I get killed in jail. But then I won't have done my sentence properly and that would be betraying Noya and Iwa who would have worked so hard to get me locked up.

I'll do my sentence. I'll get released. And then I'll try getting everyone's forgiveness.

I will try my best to be back to my best by the time I'm out.

For my friends. And especially For Noya, Shimizu, Iwaizumi, Hinata.

I'll be better for you guys.

Chapter end   
That was kinda long.  
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	25. Guilty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Court guilt and guilty verdicts

Hinata's POV

Today's the day of the court battle between Noya, Iwa and I against Asahi and his team.

Asahi used to be the type of person that backed down in stressful situations. It will be easier if he just doesn't go against evidence and let's us beat him.

In the past two weeks us three have been arranging testimonies, constant work on this case has drained us, to make it easier Iwaizumi started sleeping on the couch in my living room. This is also the first time either of us will be going outside for 3 weeks, thank god for food delivery.

The drive to the courthouse was nerve racking, this is my third time being here in three years. Tsukki, my case and now Asahi's.

Those past two times have resulted in guilty results much to my dismay but for our mental soundness I hope that he gets locked up.

The walk into the foyer was scary, seeing everybody look at me made me feel like I was at fault, Noya and Iwaizumi both saw the fear on my face so they both gripped my hands.

We all sit in the witness area which is luckily just us and two guards.

Third person POV

"We are here today to decide a verdict on the Asahi Azumane case, his accusations include. Sexual misconduct, physical abuse and attempted rape, if any of the witnesses could walk up to the stand and present evidence we will be able to start, take your time" As the judge finished speaking the three witnesses look at each other and nod.

"Please state your name, age and occupation at this current time"

"Hinata Shoyo, 18 years old, first year university student. Your honour I am here to present verbal evidence of the night Azumane tried to take advantage of me. If he could answer truthfully that would be lovely" and as he winks at Asahi, the jury goes wild. 

"22 days ago, I was drunkenly stumbling from a not very local gay bar as I was out partying, I saw a familiar house so I knocked on the door, Azumane answered the door sounding worried as we used to be friends but in my drunken state I thought he was someone else and as any drunk man is. I was horny, so I asked for sex, he easily complied and started grinding on me, as I started to sober up and tried to push him off of me he wouldn't stop, then he shoved me down on my knees and put his hard penis on my face, almost fully sober and realising I didn't want this I pushed him off of me and called the police, that's only the start of it."

"Thank you Shoyo, Azumane do you have any objections so far?" As Azumane nods a no, hanging his head down in shame he next witness comes to stand.

"Please state your name, age and occupation" the judge says, already tired of this case as it seems an obvious guilty, he just wanted more proof.

"Iwaizumi Hajime, 20 years old and a third year university student"

"Please explain yourself, evidence and all" the judge says quickly back to Iwaizumi.

"Asahi and I would hook up consensually a couple times a month for a year and a half, it was all fun and games until he was caught fucking me by the other witness Nishinoya Yuu. But that's his story and not mine.

So a few weeks after he got caught, Shoyo came to my apartment, unaware of Asahi and My arrangement, when he saw Asahi in my room he pieced together that I was Asahi's mistress. He was furious so he got angry, after Hinata left, Asahi asked me if we wanted to have round two and b-before I could answer he s-stuck it in. I can't give you any physical evidence b-but-"

"Azumane, did you do this?" The judge cuts Iwaizumi off rudely.

"I-I thought h-he wanted I-it, y-yes I d-did, I-Iwaizumi you d-don't have to forgive m-me but if I m-make it out of p-prison I w-will do anything to get y-your friendship b-back" Asahi stutters out, admitting his defeat.

"If I wanted it I would have told you Asahi, if you make it out I will try to forgive, but I'll never forget" as Iwaizumi steps down it's time for the final witness

The jury's decision was almost completely made, but they wanted to listen to the final witness.

"Thank you Hajime, can the final witness step up please and state their name, age and occupation"

"HELLO! O-oh sorry. Hello, I'm Nishinoya Yuu. 19 years of age and am in a part time job at a cafè"

"Please Yuu, give us your testimony and evidence" the judge says, in awe of Yuu's exuberance.

Nishinoya sorted through a thick stack of files until he found 5 pictures. Asahi looked up at Nishinoya, it hurt Asahi knowing that the one he loved and maybe still loves so much is going to be the one to deliver the final blow. 

"Asahi and I were together for 3 years, we loved eachother, we bought a house together, it was all so happy, until it wasn't, he went out more, became more distant and then he started ignoring me. That fateful day came when I walked into the house and saw him fucking Iwaizumi, instead of reacting normally you know what he did, he grabbed me by the neck, slammed me on the floor and started beating me up. Here your honour, here's the photographic proof." As he hands the photos to the judge, he gasps immediately, there were bruises on Noya's neck, ribs, back and even legs.

By this point the entire jury had decided that Asahi would be guilty, these photos just made their reasons even bigger.

"WE HAVE COME TO A DECISION, BY JURY AND JUDGE, WE DECLARE ASAHI AZUMANE, GUILTY. WITH AN 8 YEAR SENTENCE AND AN EARLY PAROL. COURT DISMISSED"

Hinata's POV

We Won, I can't believe it, we did it.

I look over to Noya and he's crying, I run up to him and give him a big hug, Iwaizumi joins in.

I have to tell Tsukki about this.

Chapter end  
They won, asahi in big is jail jail jail  
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	26. Mental

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not much to summarise, sad, sad, forgive, sad, forgive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the end of the chapter I really said
> 
> Chile
> 
> Lemme
> 
> Ask
> 
> The
> 
> Audience
> 
> Honestly the audacity I have to think my audience will actually comment lol.
> 
> Not only that, the audacity of me thinking I actually have an audience

Tsukishima's POV

He promised he would visit me, I don't know how long it's been since his last visit but he said he would see me soon.

When Hinata visited me I regained hope. Hope for happiness and a happy life, as soon as he re entered my life I felt like a better person. And now when I need him more than ever he disappears again.

I wish they reminded me of the time and date, but in my room it's all left to assumption, nothing but me and my mind 24/7. And with so much time alone comes thinking, and when you're isolated from everyone those thoughts slowly become dark.

When I say dark I don't mean I intend to hurt anyone, being alone has taught me to never hurt anyone ever again.

No, I wanted to start hurting myself.

So I did, from what I assumed to be two days after Hinata visited I decided to take action, obviously they don't let any sharp objects around us because, prisoners, a mental hospital and sharpeness do not go together well.

The next best thing I had is my broken bed frame, it broke early into my transfer into the mental hospital but they haven't changed it.

It's a plank of wood with a splinter on the end. As soon as I picked it up I bashed it against my leg, I bashed it 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 times before I started to feel the bone shift. But I didn't stop there, I did the same with the other leg but with the splinter side, bashing my leg until it drew blood.

It relaxed me, it was like I was giving myself payback for what fit me here.

But I still feel empty without Hinata. I need to see him before I do something that I might regret to myself.

Hinata's POV

I barely have any time to comprehend the win in court before my mind is bombarded with thoughts of what I said.

I left Tsukki alone for 3 weeks, the poor boy must have gotten some hope up.

I look at Noya and Iwa who were chatting in the front seat chatting before I interrupt their conversation 

"Noya, is there any chance you can go to the Yuzako mental hospital, I have to visit Tsukishima, would you and Iwaizumi be fine with waiting outside. Unless you don't want to wait it might be too much for you you've had such a traumatic day I'm so sorry I'm just making it wor-" 

"Only if we can go in. I know it's one visitor in a room at a time but we can wait outside for you. Is that okay?"

"OF COURSE- I mean thank you thank you thank youuuuuuu. I made a promise that I would visit him more and I haven't seen him since the day we started preparations for the case" and Noya just looks at me with a soft smile and nods.

As we arrive at the gate of the Mental Assy- hospital, we all show our ID's. And the drive to the back of the car park was silent after.

"T-this place looks terrible, poor Tsukishima" Noya speaks up. I just nod sadly, it's my fault he's here, I might have broken Tsukki, one of the people I loved.

"Hello- oh it's Kei's boy. And some friends, that's nice, just remember only one visitor in his room at a time. You remember where he is right?" And I just nod and thank her for her kindness.

As I arrive at his door I feel chills run down my back, something doesn't feel right. 

Obviously I am going to be the first visitor, it seemed like an unspoken law as the two just backed into the waiting room as I entered Tsukki's room with no warning.

"Hi Tsukki, I'm so sorry for not visit- TSUKKI NO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" As I run up to him I tear the plank of wood away from him.

He was trying to hurt himself, his legs were all bloody and bruised and he was crying in a ball on the floor.

I just walk up behind him and hug him tightly as he turns around and looks at my face.

"I-I never thought I-I'd see you again. Hinata please visit me more I can't deal to live without you" and I just nod and peck his cheek.

"Tsukki, I'm so so so sorry. I had to prepare for court-"

"Y-you W-WHAT!, p-please DONT t-tell me you're in t-trouble" Tsukki stutters out.

"No no, it's nothing like that baby, I was actually a victim of sexual assault by our ex teammate Asahi Azumane, I was preparing a testimony with Nishinoya who was physically abused by Asahi and Iwaizumi Hajime who was raped by Asahi. I'll try to visit you once a week until you get sent out, I just wish there was a way we could contact" I see Tsukki frown, before he says anything I need to clear the elephant out of the room.

"And baby, what was that, please tell me I'm so scared that you might hurt yourself beyond repair. Even if you do I'm willing to fix you babe. Please tell me" I plead, his eyes start watering.

"I- I was scared that you would never want to see me again after you last visited me. I thought it must have been years since your last visit. I thought you hated me and you were disgusted by me so I just started hurting myself to put the pain off my heart and onto my body, I'm so sorr-"

I cut him off with a loving kiss, it's been 3 years since we were able to share our love with eachother. It felt like home, home is where your loved ones are.

"Tsukki, I have to go. Do you want to see Nishinoya?" As I see him give a slight nod I give him one more peck on the forehead before leaving the room.

"Noya, beware of blood. I'll call the nurses after you see him. Just be careful my poor baby is very unstable" he just gives me a comforting hug before walking in.

"Your baby, huh, Hinata, didn't know you were a to-"

"If I ever do it with Tsukki. I'll be whatever he feels comfortable with. You know I hate labels Iwa" an he just chuckles before hugging me.

Tsukishima's POV

As the door opens again I expect to see Hinatas face again. Instead I see someone else.

Who is it again, I haven't thought of anyone but Hinata since I got here.

I think Hinata mentioned a person with a name that started with Ni. This must be him.

"H-hi, I'm sorry about my condition. I d-don't know if I remember you, can you please reintroduce yourself" as I say this I see his face change into one of tears. "Oh no I didn't mean to make you cry. I'm so sorry".

"N-no, I'm fine. It's not your fault you don't remember me, you must have been through so much, I'm crying because the last time I saw you was when you were crying because Daichi was yelling at you and I didn't try to stop him. I apologise, my name is Nishinoya Yuu, we were in the same volleyball team when you were in first year. We didn't have the best face to face relationship but I always valued you as a friend and a teammate. I really wanted you to know that but you left us before I had the chance."

V-volleyball, I- I think I'm remembering some of it.

"I think I remember some stuff, were you the Libero?" And this is all it takes for Nishinoya to break down crying.

I catch him before he collapses onto the floor and he just sits against my chest.

"D-don't push yourself too hard, that's all you need to know. Tsukki, I'm so sorry for not standing up for you, m-maybe if I did you wouldn't be in this condition".

"I forgive you, Nishinoya-Senpai" at the mention of the nickname he smiles brightly up at me.

"I'm glad. It's about time to go but I'll make sure Hinata brings me to visit you sometimes. Bye Tsukki" I just wave back at him.

Was that..... progress.

Is this feeling happiness?

I need to hide this wooden plank from myself, I don't want to let Hinata or Noya down.

Thank you for saving me again, Hinata.

Chapter end  
Non, je ne Regrette rien  
Lol, more Tsukki because I'm never letting him die.  
This is the point where I have to ask what ship has progressed enough for you to be an endgame ship.

Comment for TsukiHina

Comment for BokuKenHina

Comment for NoyaHina

Comment for single for life

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	27. New normal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TSUKKI GETS OUT OF HIS SENTENCE FINALLY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MENTIONS OF RAPE  
> MENTIONS OF VIOLENCE  
> HAPPY END TO THE CHAPTER THO

Hinatas POV

The next 8 months went as promised, I visited Tsukishima once a week, sometimes if I finished school early I would go twice or three times. He started opening up to me with his whole experience.

Flashback  
Third person POV

3 months from the visit after the court hearing and Hinata and Tsukishima's relationship was building stronger than ever.

The usual 7 day wait between seeing Hinata was almost too long for Tsukishima, but it helped that Hinata snuck him in a digital watch that told him the date and time.

Tsukishima was starting to trust Hinata completely, so he felt it was finally time to tell Hinata about what got him moved from the prison into the mental hospital.

Spoiler alert. It wasn't just him getting beaten up.

Tsukishima looked down at his watch. '22nd of June 11:22 am' . "It's been 3 days since Hinata has visited me, feels longer here" he says to himself.

Little does he know Hinata is going to surprise him today, he brought some food for Tsukki to eat, he brought a strawberry shortcake and some macaroons because he knew Tsukki hated the food.

Tsukki heard 3 knocks, assuming it's just one of the nurses he just lets out a monotonous "come in".

As Hinata opens the door, he sees Tsukki look at him and he is suddenly tackled in a bear hug, Tsukki's big arms wrapping around Hinata's small frame.

"Hinata, what are you doing here, I thought you had school. It's still 11?"

"I finished all of my lectures early Tsu, I brought you your favourite desserts so let's sit down and eat" Tsukishima doesn't even have to ask what hinata brought because he already knew.

As Hinata sat next to Tsukishima on the floor he brought out two plates and put a quarter of the cake on each plate and decorated it with the macaroons.

"Babe, you don't have to make it so fancy. I love it though it's so cute" Tsukishima says to his lover.

"I love doing things for you Tsu, you deserve everything so some fancy food won't hurt~ now let's eat" as Hinata passed Tsukishima the plastic cutlery, many thoughts started rolling in Tsukishima's head.

'I think I should tell him, all of it, seems appropriate over cake'  
'No he will think you're disgusting'  
'He would never he loves me'  
'Things change slut'

"Tsu~Tsu, you look deep in thought, do you have anything to tell me?" Hinata said, looking at Tsukishima with worried eyes.

"I- um, yes, I've never told you the full story of what happened to me before I got transferred here, Hinata. I'm scared of how you will react, I'm scared y-you might leave me I-if I tell you. P-please don't leave me." Tsukishima has tears pouring out of his eyes. 

"T-Tsukki, I would never leave you, not after everything we have been through. Please I promise you can trust me with whatever you have to say. Baby, please, trust me" Hinata says with pleading eyes. As soon as Tsukishima sees his face he knows he can trust Hinata.

"O-ok, so when I was in the prison the other inmates would constantly verbally abuse me. It started as petty insults like four eyes before it became m-more personal. Appearance, sexuality, weight. Whatever they could see that was abnormal they told me. After them pointing Fault after fault after fault every day I had to do something. I thought telling a guard would be my best option, t-this was my biggest mistake. You want to know what she said" Hinata nods silently into Tsukishimas chest.

"You deserve it. She told me that I deserve it. And she told the people who were targeting me to do more. So they did. It became physical very quickly after I told her. One day they tied me to some prison bars a-and t-they snapped my arm in half like it was nothing. And I received no care until I came here, but there is still more."

"The final thing that broke me was on my second last day, the three men saw me as an opportunity to express their sexual frustration on. When they saw me sleeping they thought they struck gold. They woke me up by punching my back repeatedly and they shoved their whole hand into m-me shortly after I woke up. Another one of the men pried my head open and started choking me with h-his c-cock. Two of the men raped me while the other abused my throat. They did this for hours. I passed out half way through because of the pain and they immediately woke me up by breaking my jaw so it just hung open. After they finished the men choked me until I passed out and continued to beat me up. When I woke up I was in here with machines and lights around me. I was in a coma for 1 month. I'm s-so s-sorry H-hinata, I k-know you hate me and find me disgusting and you never want to talk to me aga-"

"Who are they? I hope they rot in hell where they belong. Tsukki. Tsu~Tsu, I don't hate you, you have been through so much that you didn't deserve and without my influence you wouldn't have gone through this. I love you, I'm so so glad that you could trust me enough to trust me with this, your story of perseverance is inspiring. You've come so far and you are so much better than them. You are amazing Tsukishima. You've been so amazing to me, when you get out I'm going to spoil you so much, because you deserve everything and more."

As Tsukishima cried into Hinatas chest. He felt relief rush over him, Hinata was all he had so if he lost him he would be nothing.

"I-I love you too, Hinata"

And the two men share a loving kiss before a certain nurse walks in.

"Shoyo it's been an hou- sorry for interrupting but it's time for you two leave"

As the two men shared there goodbyes, the world moved around normally, even after hearing Tsukki's story the world still remained the same.

Flashback over 

Hinatas POV

And that's where we are, 5 months later I'm waiting outside Tsukki's Asylum, waiting for him to come running outside the plain white doors.

I have Noya and Iwa beside me. Iwaizumi ended up moving into my house, a rent being payed three ways is super easy it turns out.

Also I think those two have something going on that they're not telling me, but I won't pry, I'll wait for them to tell me. 

It feels like we have been waiting forever. I'm too impatient but I've been waiting for this moment for longer than I would like to admit.

Re finding my love for Tsukki was the key to gaining happiness. We seem to need eachother, but our love for eachother outweighs our need.

I decide to walk into the 'Institute' and Tsukki and I lock eyes, the police are making him do some final paperwork.

I just give him a warm smile, one that says 'you're coming home' and he just gives a little smile back

'I'm so exited to go back to hinata. We can live together and get married and buy a house.' I hear Tsukki think. I just blush and while I'm not paying attention I feel a hand touch my shoulder.

"He's now yours, thank you for your Patience Shoyo, goodbye Tsukishima. Have fun and don't get in trouble again!" Nurse Yuko says, looking sternly at Tsukki but she sounded generally happy.

As soon as Tsukki is released out of the police's grasp, he runs straight to me. His whole body knocking me over.

"H-hinata, I-I'm going to go outside! I'm so exited. Is Noya with you? I want to see him too."

"Of course Noya came with me to pick you up, he also brought his boyfriend but don't tell him I told you. Let's go out to eat Babe" and I see Tsukki nod excitedly.

As we walk out of the door hand in hand. Tsukki spots Noya and sends me a look that says 'can I run over to him' and I just nod at him.

Before I know it Tsukki is sprinting towards Noya and just like me he knocks him over.

An exited Tsukki is the cutest.

"Tsu~Tsu, be careful with Noya's delicate body~" I say out to them. Over Tsukki's shoulder I see Noya give me a look that says 'you're going to regret that' I just send a wink his way.

Were all chatting on the way to the cafe. Noya and Tsukki are talking about god knows what. I think Noya told him about an anime that started when Tsukki was away so Noya wants to introduce him to it. While they are talking I decide now would be a good time to grill Iwa on his feelings for Noya.

"Hey Iwaizumi, is there anyone you're interested in at the moment" he just goes bright red and nods a quick no.

Too bad so sad.

'I can't tell him about my relationship with Noya. Noya said to wait until it's official but I want to ask him out now. Ugh I hate relationships' I just silently chuckle at the contrast of his thoughts.

Well, the cafe trip might almost be a double date. How cute.

Chapter end  
Omg, Tsukki is back in public, how is he going to react to the real world.  
Also, Iwa and Noya went through the same stuff so I thought 'hey let's create another ship out of trauma'  
Are we staying with tsukihina. I think so. They've been through so much that I feel like they deserve eachother  
Anywaysssss. Vote, kudos, comment, share, like  
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	28. Double, no, triple date

Hinatas POV

I think it's safe to say Tsukki still has no idea of time or distance.

Like a little kid, he kept pointing out little things like animals and students that were walking home from school. And like a kid on a road trip he kept asking 'are we there yet?' But in his own cute way.

When I say he asked constantly, I literally mean every 30 seconds he would pull on my arm.

"Hinata, are we close?" I just nod, not wanting to give him the same answer I've given him for the past 30 minutes.

But this time I wasn't lying, we were pulling up to the cafe and Tsukki's eyes went wide.

"W-wow, are we going here. It's so pretty!" Tsukki says right into my face.

"Yes we are Tsu~Tsu. Also, Noya were in public can you maybe just turn down WAP. Just a recommendation" as I see Iwaizumi start laughing in the front seat I see Noya turn the volume knob up all the way.

'Macaroni in the pot, that's some wet ass pussy' we all sing in unison, except for Tsukki who just looks at us confused.

I just shrug it off as I hug him. Having Tsukki back is the best thing that has happened to me in at least 1 year.

As WAP finished we walk outside of the car, people staring at us because of our performance, which might have not been child appropriate.

Lol I don't care, kill all babies 

As we walk into the cafe I see two familiar and very memorable haircuts.

Bokuto and Kenma. 

Of course, someone had to go and ruin my happy day. Now it's not like I hate them but I generally think they lost all interest in me after my isolation. Well I'm just going to try and not get noticed by the-

"Hey hey HEY! HINA HINA! What are you doing here? It's been a while" Bokuto say- screams out at me. Did your mother never teach you inside and outside voice.

I just grit my teeth at this statement, wonder why we haven't seen eachother in a year. Ugh I feel like I owe both of them kindness after the trauma I put them through mentally.

"Hi" yeah that's it, that's all I can say. I don't want to come off like I don't like them so the less words the better.

"Shoyo, you should join us. You and your friends, we can catch up and everything" I hear Kenma speak softly, his soft voice was a great distraction from the walking amplifier next to him.

Before agreeing for them I look around to seeing Tsukki, Noya and Iwaizumi nod, Tsukki looking very exited to have more social interaction, or maybe he just wanted to sit down and eat. Both valid.

'Ok, move to a bigger table then Kozu- Kenma. And ampli- Bokuto. Lower your volume please before I smack it out of you~" I say, stuttering on both of their names before regaining composure.

So they think they can leave me at my house after my sentence and not talk to me for almost a year. And then see me and expect me to act like I'm automatically ok with them. Too bad I hold grudges.

I don't plan on physically hurting them, just a little guilt tripping won't hurt. Me. It probably will hurt them mentally, and also sometimes things don't go as plan.

As we all sit at the table of six I feel two pairs of eyes stare at my face, a cat and an owl.

"So~ what do you two find so interesting about my face?, huh Kenma and Bokuto" at the mention of my face Tsukki drags me into his lap and cuddles me.

Did I tell you that he's adorable, I don't think I've mentioned it enough.

I see their faces light up, blushing a dark shade of crimson while becoming stuttering messes. Wow do I really have that effect on people?

"Bokuto~ Kenma~ I have one question, please answer honestly. I see both of them nod furiously, seems they are still smitten with me. Tok bad I have my Tsukki.

"Where have you two been the past year? You take me out of isolation after 2 years and since you dropped me home you haven't kept in contact with me. Now you see me as a golden opportunity, I'm better now and that's why you want me, you couldn't stand a broken Hinata. You two disgust me" I hear gasps all around me as Tsukki squeezes me.

"Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahaha, Hinata oh my fucking god. I literally love you so much, you tell em. Wait, wrong moment?" I hear Noya say, he's got the spirit but not the timing.

Unlike Noya, the two men were not happy, looking like two villains after their plan has been figured out, shock and anger present on their faces, that tells me all I need to know.

"Hey hey HEY! HINATA! W-WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT! I know it was scummy that we left you and all but were here now, right?" Bokuto speaks, face cracking.

"You- you think you're here for me right now. Bokuto, you literally came to this cafe with no prior knowledge that I was going to be here. You're not here for me, you're literally here to feed your fat mouth and eat your feelings because your boyfriend doesn't actually love you~ right Kenma?" I send a cheeky grin to kenma as a sad aura washes over his face.

"I-I love Bokuto-san, he buys me stuff an-"

"Let me stop you right there sweetheart. When you love someone usually the first thing that comes to mind is how nice and caring they are, not that they are your owl looking sugar daddy, right Tsukki?" I look over it my boyfriend and he turns his head away from his cutlery as he cuts in.

"Hinata, if I was to name everything I love about you we would be stuck here for eternity" Tsukki says with loving eyes, I just blush heavily.

"You two are so sweet it literally makes me sick" says Iwa who was watching this 'performance' with Noya.

"HE-HEY! a-are you telling the truth. Kenma please tell me you love me, I love you so much, you love me too right?" Bokuto says, tears threatening to fall down his owl like face.

"I'm sorry Bokuto, I know you've been through a lot so I-I just wanted to see you happy again, I don't love you. I just wanted to support you" As kenma pauses I send a smirk to Bokuto who just looks I'm Kenma's direction furiously.

A loud slap rung through the cafe. Thank god for phones and evidence. I've recorded so much stuff that I could make a movie at this point.

"K-KENMA, HOW COULD YOU, I LOVED YOU, I SAVED YOU FROM YOUR NIGHTMARES. GET IN THE CAR WE ARE TALKING!" I hear Bokuto scream, but this time unlike most, he was angry-screaming. As Noya, Iwaizumi and Tsukki look at me I just nod as we walk out of the cafe. Throwing money at the counter as we get in the car.

"Any song recommendations?" I hear Noya speak.

"Give me...... fuyunohanashi from given. I want to be sad about something and Kenma and Bokuto are too pitiful to make me sad, Tsukki ready you're shoulder because I'm about to CRY"

And guess what, I did.

Chapter end   
What do you think, did kenma and Bokuto deserve this?  
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	29. Grand Finale

Hinata's POV.

My almost 20 years of life have been eventful to say the least.

Sadly I am going to end it all, not because I'm not satisfied with my life at this current moment, because I am. I have a loving boyfriend. I have best friends that forgive my past mistakes and I have some of my old friend group still in tact.

No, I want to kill my self, then Tsukki, then Noya, then Iwa for two people to do the same.

Sugawara Kōshi and Daichi Sawamura, my ex senpais that turned into the two people that still give me dirty glares in the halls of the university. The two people that ditched an entire friend group for their own selfish wants.

They don't deserve happiness. So I'm here to end it all for them. Whatever hope they had, I want to crush it. Shatter it like it's glass.

So I guess today is my final day. Which is also Tsukki, Noya and Iwa's too. It hurts me that I want to do this, but oh, the sweet taste of victory when I see Suga show up in the afterlife after we die. It's going to be worth all of it.

I've prepared this flawlessly, and do you know how hard it is to plan 3 murders then a suicide in a small house that you share with your future victims. No, you don't.

I see the three men sitting on the couch chatting about god knows what. I guess I should spend all of today with them before they die.

"Hey guys, lets do something today, maybe we should go to the amusement park, and then we can go to the cafe. Oh and I have a surprise planned for you guys at 6 so we have to be here to later than 5:50"

I see all of their heads shoot up before Noya starts speaking "Why didn't you just say, of course we would all like to go, ahhhhhh, my favourite kouhai is so considerate" Noya says the last part with a large grin on his face as I feel Tsukki's arms wrap around me.

On the drive we were just singing, very off key must I add, but it was so much fun, if you have a pop diva you can name we have probably performed them in the car, Ariana, Gaga, Taylor, Katy, Rihanna and so much more. Don't forget about the underrated artists as well like Allie X, Caroline Polachek, Crumb and Declan McKenna. 

As we arrive at the amusement park we very quickly realise this is not going to be a stress free trip, and Tsukki is scared of highs, I know, how funny.

Well I find it more cute than funny but you do you.

Anyways, we go to the biggest roller coaster and noya is just the height limit, thank god.

We get paired up sitting next to eachother, Me and Noya and in the next car Tsukki and Iwa. We are used to all cuddling and comforting eachother so it won't be weird.

As soon as we get on I feel Noya tense right beside me. 

"Noya, hold my hand, lean into my chest. Don't worry about it, I'll be holding on to you. When I'm here you won't get hurt~" I coo as he blushes. How cute.

"H-hinata that's so sweet. I-I also have something to tell you when we get to the top"

"Why when we get to the top?" I say confusedly

"Because when I'm there, I'll feel like I can do anything, and I don't want you to react badly so I trust to say it in a scary situation where people could hear me scream" he says the last part with a grin on his face, obviously joking about my past........ issues.

Not. Funny.

I just let out a chuckle, but Noya knows me better than that. It seems that he realises his mistake after the fact.

"H-hinata I didn't mean that. I know you would never hurt me. I'm so sorry, you've been comforting me all the way up and I insult yo-"

"Were at the top Noya, Say. What. You. Wanted. To. Say" I force out, but not because I'm angry. Quite the opposite, Noya saying he knows I would never hurt him made me feel incredibly guilty. But maybe we'll meet in another life.

"Hinata, would you be my boyfriend?" I gasp, I thought he and Iw-

"You're probably thinking, he's dating Iwaizumi right, well yes I am. But I'm also in love with you and Tsukki aswell. If you say yes we could be a foursome couple, what do you say?"

"Sure" and the roller coaster drops, Noya kisses me and I look back into the carriage behind us and see Iwaizumi and Tsukki making out.

That's. Hot. As. Fuck. 

As the ride finishes I run into Tsukki's arms and kiss him, then I see Iwa and Noya looking at us for permission to join.

I just gesture them over and I suddenly feel a muscular body behind me. Iwaizumi is kissing the back of my neck as Noya was touching Iwa's ass.

I have to stop this.

"Guys, sorry to, uh, burst your bubble, but were in public and I'm not into that, sorry not sorry" I say and I see them blush red in embarrassment.

After three hours we left the amusement park, and we were now on the way to our favourite restaurant to eat an early dinner.

It's currently 4:33, if we order in 10 minutes the food will be cooked by 5:20. We should get home by 5:50 which leaves enough time to get them relaxed at home before the bomb- 

"Hinata, you seem deep in thought, what are you thinking about?, is it about what happened at the amusement park~" I hear Iwaizumi say with a teasing voice, ugh that hot bastard.

"It's actually about that surprise I told you about. I was thinking if we were going to make it. We should so don't worry babe(s)" they all blush at the pet name as we go to the restaurant.

As expected the order goes through, and is cooked by 5:20.

We decide to not eat until we get home. The bombs are supposed to set off in mine and Tsukki's room so I am going to have to do some great convincing to get them to eat there.

"Hey noyaaaaaaa, the surprise is in my room, so maybe we could eat dinner there and then do something after~" Noya just blushed dark red as he nods, speechless.

As we arrive home it's 5:48. I decide to set everything up. Putting my fake suicide note on the table as the others were in my room eating.

It's 5:59, the bombs are going to go off any second.

"Hey guys I'm going to go get the surprise. Stay exactly where you are and you might get a treat tonight~" I say, a bit of sexual frustration should make them obey.

5

4

3

2

1

I shove my hands over my head as the screaming starts, large bangs and blood curdling screams of the ones I love.

Why did I do this, to get petty revenge. Now I have to continue with my part of the plan.

I grab the arsenic that is rolled up under the bathroom sink. I consume it all and start feeling queasy. Before I see black I hear the cries of Iwaizumi who was screaming his heart out. Bye world, for good.

Chapter end  
We're nearing the end of act I of this book.   
I have huge plans for act II.  
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	30. Second chances

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final chapter of this book omfg

Hinata's POV

White, all around me. A blinding white light. And it's not hospital lights, it's the gate, the gate that will either let me into heaven or down to hell.

"So that was the surprise, huh" I hear a familiar voice say to me. Nishinoya's.

I just look away from him, ashamed to even look in his direction.

"Can I ask, why. I love you Hinata, us three love you so much, so why kill us only to kill yourself slower and all alone. Why not at least stay with us?" He sounds calm, way too calm for someone that's just been murdered.

"Noya, I-I love you too. I did this for selfish reasons. Tsukki, Iwa. My amazing boyfriends I am so sorry, I just took your life away and-"

I feel all of their arms wrap around me.

"Explain it to us when were in heaven" Iwa says to me with a smile as the cue moved further along. After hours of waiting it seemed we were finally at the front.

Noya was the first one. He just started walking up the steps and kept walking. 

Tsukki actually stumbled on some steps, signifying that he has made some mistakes, but he is a good person at the end of the day.

Iwa literally ran up into Tsukki and Noya's arms.

I start shaking, fuck, it's my turn.

I walk and I feel the stairs below me start to sink. Then I look up at noya who is crying as he sees me sink down.

Until I stop sinking. But instead of being able to move I feel like my feet are glued to the ground.

I see time stop in front of me, Noya's tears suddenly becoming frozen.

As I see a man with a plague mask walk up behind me.

"Hinata Shoyo, killer of Kageyama Tobio, Akaashi Keiji, Oikawa Tooru, Nishinoya Yuu, Iwaizumi Hajime and Tsukishima Kei, is that right?" I just nod as he lets out a sigh.

"Hey kid, I'm known by you humans as 'death' but you can literally call me anything, even dad. I'm not against it. Anyways that's off topic. You've had a tough run at life. Raped and abused as a child and now killer of people that you love. I am here to give you an opportunity to right your wrongs, would you hear me out?"

"Yes...... dad" I see the figure in the plague mask stand up taller in his cloak as he hears his nickname.

"Ooh, don't flatter me too much. I'm pretty old hehe. Anyways, it's a situation I can't explain to you but here's the background. You won't get a perfect life, instead, I am going to turn back time to when you were in first year. Then rest is up to you. But the final thing I can tell you remember the date you killed Tsukishima, Nishinoya, Iwaizumi and yourself. On that day. August the 28th when your 19. I will visit you and you will decide if you'd rather live in your fixed world our be in purgatory staying unnoticed by anyone that isn't a human medium, do you agree?"

I don't even need to think, a world where all of those that I've killed are alive and don't remember what I've done. Of course. New relationships, new friendships and NO KILLING.

"I agree. I'm kind of tired of being stuck in these steps so-"

I get cut off by a snap of fingers. I see them rewind, replaying all of my mistakes in major detail. The bombs, killing Oikawa, killing Akaashi and driving Kageyama to suicide.

Don't worry guys I'm going to save you 

Chapter and book 1 end  
Guys that's it for feelings are fatal, thank you so much for supporting this.  
I am going to start a second book soon, I just want to plan it out a bit so I know what I'm doing  
Anywaysssss. Vote, kudos, comment, share, like  
Woo!

I hope to see all of you on the second part of this ❤️


	31. I’m sorry (a progress update)

Hey, sorry to be the bearer of bad news but I will not be continuing this book, i wrote 4 chapters for my launch for book 2 but in 2 weeks I haven’t felt any motivation to continue writing, there is a chance I will continue this book but at this point I have moved on from this concept. I hope you can support me on future projects.

I love you so much, thanks for supporting my first ever book, it really means the world to me


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